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What's the worst pickup line you've ever heard?


Registered Member
I'm a little older than a lot of you, so I would think that mine is an oldie, but mine is "if I told you that you had a fine body would you hold it against me".

What's the worse pickup line you've ever heard or used? :D

BTW: This is one that was used on me, not vice versa.
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#2 New Zealander
Spoiler for sexual Material:lol:

"Do you work at Subway? Because you just gave me a Footlong"

"If I flip a coin, What's the chance of me getting head?"

"Do you like whales? Because Ive got a humpback at my Place"

And yes, I have used them, mostly in Jest though:p


Chirp Chirp
I'll take your lead on the spoiler, for the first one at least..
"Hey baby, how would you like it if me and you went upstairs and I inserted my penis into your vagina and we had sexual intercourse?"
"Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?"

"Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk past again?"

"Hi, I'm Chaos."

Oh wait, that last one is actually quite effective.


It's not me, it's you.
Why don't you sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that comes up.


Well-Known Member
Why don't you sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that comes up.
If I had a dollar for every time this ones being used on me, I would be one rich fucker.

I can't think of any off the top of my head to add. I'll come back and edit this after i've been to the pub and my memory has been refreshed. :lol:

EDIT: This one was used on me at the taxi stand Saturday night after a night out. "How about I share the taxi with you back to your place?" Atleast it was original.
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/ˈɪzəˌbɛl/ pink 5
(On a bus) I just can't help but tell you, you have the most amazing eyes.

(Bar) Do I know you? You look familiar. Maybe because I saw you in my dreams.

(Road) I just have to stop and talk to you. I'd really like to know you, may I buy you a cup of coffee?

Yes, they're all lame. But if the person who said it was hot (the road guy was sort of that), I wouldn't really mind the lameness. :hah:


Sultan of Swat
Staff member
You lift up her ticket on the back of her shirt, and you say just what I thought, made in heaven.

Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa just what I want for Christmas.


I am the woolrus
1. "Are you Jamaican? Cus jer-makin-me crazy!"

2. *lick your finger and wipe it on the girl* Then say: "Let's get you out of those wet clothes."

3. "You make my software turn to hardware"

4. "Have you got any Irish in you?" "No." "Would you like some?"

5. "I have a knife. Let's go."


It's not me, it's you.