ugh, I'm so disgusted in myself :/

Discussion in 'Health & Fitness' started by storm_ina_C_cup, Jun 11, 2010.

  1. storm_ina_C_cup

    storm_ina_C_cup Registered Member


    As you may or may not know, I'm a half-decent health nut; I run / workout / go to kickboxing on a daily / nightly basis; eat / drink healthfully.......blah freaking blah blah; but lately I've been under alot of stress due to some personal things. Anyway, way back when (in my late teens / twenties) I was a "social smoker"; meaning: I would smoke cigarettes when I drank. Well, last weekend we had a couple friends over for a bite to eat and a few drinks and one of the girls said, "I'm going out for a cigarette, do you mind"? And I said, "No, problem!. . .Actually, I'll come with you, I fancy a smoke".
    It was the worst thing I could have EVER done to myself.
    ...Since I had that cigarette, I've been craving them like crazy! And, well, today, I bought a pack.:shifteyes: And smoked one.:shake:

    I have decent will-power but I find myself extremely *weak* at the moment... Any suggestions / advice or a swift kick up the arse would do me wonders if someone here wouldn't mind giving it to me.:-/

  2. ysabel

    ysabel /ˈɪzəˌbɛl/ pink 5

    Throw the pack - it might seem like throwing away money but you'll live with that decision more than living with getting into the habit. Cravings will come, just endure it...they do go away if you hold long enough.
  3. Babe_Ruth

    Babe_Ruth Sultan of Swat Staff Member V.I.P.

    I'm not going to lie but I'm disappointed in you, if there's one thing that I hate is smoking, especially on attractive ladies. Just throw the damn pack away like Ysabel mentioned, but make sure to destroy the cigarettes so they're not smokable.

    I'm sure since your a health nut you know the bad effects smoking causes someone, so just think of that and how it might ruin your image. Also just think of your little girl. I know you probably don't do it front of her, but just think of her.

    Hopefully that helped a bit.
  4. AnitaKnapp

    AnitaKnapp It's not me, it's you. V.I.P. Lifetime

    Unfortunately, you just have to push through the cravings. Mine lasted for probably 10 days before I just didn't think about it anymore. Anytime I would, I would just replace it with an activity...such as gaming or leaving to go window shopping or something.

    Right now it's just a craving. If you continue to do it, it's going to become a habit, and will be even worse to quit.
  5. storm_ina_C_cup

    storm_ina_C_cup Registered Member

    This sounds terrible, but I don't want to let them go just yet.:embarassed:

    yes, I'm well aware of what smoking does to ones health. And that was my husband's exact arguement when I told him I was craving them all week. He said he'd really be disappointed in me if I began smoking; god, he's gunna blow his top when he comes home to find that I reek of smoke!

    And no, I don't allow anyone to smoke in my house or around my daughter; they're always sent outside.
    ...Fortunately, she's not home and didn't see me smoking outside.

    I know all of you are right in what you're saying and this is why I didn't go right out and buy them the day I noticed I had the craving. . .I waited. ugh, What a loser.:urp:

    Do you always go through cravings? Or is it only when you're stressed out, etc?
    ...This is the first time I've had a craving for something other than ice cream, lol.
  6. AnitaKnapp

    AnitaKnapp It's not me, it's you. V.I.P. Lifetime

    ONLY when I was stressed out. I wasn't addicted to the nicotine at all. I had to replace it with something else that I really enjoyed, like gaming.

    I was much like you...only craved them when something stressful was going on. I believe I started smoking when my grandfather was dying. He was a very important person to me, and I was the "strong" one in my family that everyone looked to, so I wasn't allowed to grieve at the time. I had to have some kind of outlet.

    The ironic thing is...I'm sure that cigarettes are what declined his health so rapidly. He basically had several heart attacks over the last 2 years of his life, and he died very slowly as his organs shut down one by one because of the damage in his heart and lungs.

    However, for me I just kept smoking. It became a habit. Every day after work I would sit out on my patio, read a book, and smoke. I didn't even smoke all day at work, or anything like that. Only when I wanted to relax.

    To quit for good (I've been quit nearly 2 months) I replaced that daily activity with gaming. I don't have to do it anymore, though. I just had to occupy my mind enough that I would absolutely forget about it.

    If you can think of anything, I would try to do something that you enjoy, and that fully engages your brain.
  7. Rebeccaaa

    Rebeccaaa yellow 4!

    Sure you don't want to, silly. But you must! It's the only way. Quitting is all about mental rather than physical. One more cigarette from that pack you have there isn't going to kill you, but psychologically, it can do more damage for your health than 500 cigarettes. Go throw the pack away, now! Just pick it up and destroy it. It's hard, but you can do it. And you will feel so, so much better in yourself for doing it once these cravings pass.

    Best of luck. I know you can do it. Go, NAO!
  8. CaptainObvious

    CaptainObvious Son of Liberty V.I.P.

    Seriously, reading this thread makes me want to smoke a cigarrette:-/

    I haven't smoked all year, I think it was around December when I had my last one. And now I want one bad.
  9. storm_ina_C_cup

    storm_ina_C_cup Registered Member

    I'm sorry you lost your Grandfather, Anita. <3

    My problem is, I do have alot to do mentally & physically- sometimes too much but that's my own fault. I've never had an interest in gaming; which is probably a good thing because of my responsibility as a mother and a wife. I mean, they'd never see me if I became addicted!:lol:

    I must say I'm proud of you though for going on 2 months without a cigarette.:)

    ...I do feel guilty that I purchased them and smoked one, that's for sure.:-/

    I know I need to throw them away. Now be quiet.:lol:;) meloveyoulongtime


    Were you a social smoker or were you a genuine smoker?
    Last edited: Jun 11, 2010
  10. AnitaKnapp

    AnitaKnapp It's not me, it's you. V.I.P. Lifetime

    Yeah, but you need to do something that doesn't allow you to have the time to smoke. :p

    What about puzzles games or such? Or logic word problems or something? I used to get those Penny Press or Dell word magazines all the time.

    You need something carefree, and that won't add anymore stress. Taking what I'm stressing over out of my head for even an hour, is a huge help to me.

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