The Worrier - help

Discussion in 'Dating & Relationships' started by orangevulture, Feb 19, 2010.

  1. orangevulture

    orangevulture Registered Member

    i am a 17 year old male and i have a 17 year old gf. I hate her being at school because i dont want any bitches to start drama with her. she stands up for herself but she usually dosent care kinda wat a couple girls say but i can stand anyone degrading her. i stick up for her all the time especially with guys and she dosent get into a lot of drama but i dont even want her outside now. she likes school but i always think its to cold or she could get hurt or drama can happen and i just want a 100% chance tht everything will be okay even though she likes school. so i like it when she stays home. and shes only had drama with like 5-6 ppl at school. teachers at our school said i need to have her fight her own battles to because i always go to guidance when anything happens to her. but if i ever hear tht even one girl looked at my gf in a bad way i'll think about it for weeks before i can actually do something bout it. i take prozac for the worrying but i feel tht it is normal i jsut love her a lot. do you think i worry to much should i let her be more free? srry i know this is retardedly long thx for the responses. i jsut want her to be always happy and i cant stand when ppl tht have there own severe mental issues take it out on her. any advice?
     

  2. Wade8813

    Wade8813 Registered Member

    Yes, you're overprotective. And it's quite possibly making the situation worse. For every time it helps, there could be a dozen ways it's hurting things, but you can't always tell.

    I'm not saying you shouldn't stand up for her. I'm saying you should only get really involved in the big things.

    Not wanting her outside? Not wanting her to go to school? Unless there's some seriously messed up stuff going on, you're starting to act like those stereotyped abusive husbands that control everything in their wife's life, and claim it's for her own good. I'm not saying you're bad like them, but that's the sort of thing they do.

    To be honest, I kinda understand where you're coming from. If I had a wife or kid, I'd be paranoid about something happening to them.

    (BTW, the problem with your post wasn't that it was too long; it just had no paragraph breaks and horrible spelling :lol:)
     
  3. storm_ina_C_cup

    storm_ina_C_cup Registered Member

    Talk to your doctor again, it doesn't sound like Prozac is working for you or maybe you just need an adjustment to your dose?

    (you might find this a little :shifteyes: at your age) But I suggest you try meditating- teach your body and mind how to relax, this will help, I assure you.;)

    As far as your over-protectiveness goes, this should calm down once you have control over your anxiety / worry, etc. but until you do something about it, it's not going to get any better and could very easily get worse.

    Can I ask you a personal question? Where do you think all this anxiety and worry stems from? Are you a nervous kind of kid or do you live in a household that stresses you out?

    Also, I realize you love your gf but christ, dating someone that always finds herself in dramatic situations is not a healthy situation for you to be in- at least not until you're able to control your anxiety.
     
  4. orangevulture

    orangevulture Registered Member

    Thanks a lot guys, you two are the only help ive actually got so far on this forum.

    Wade - I know i should only get involved in the big things but i feel like a bad bf if i dont help with everything.

    The little things bug me more than the big things for some reason probably cause my mind fills in the gap of the worst posible outcome. But when its something big it cant because i know the full situation.

    I'm definitely not abusive or anything bad lol i know your just joking but respect and idolize my gf very much but i do make jokes about building a cage for my daughter lol (im gonna be one of those dads probably lol) but of course there just jokes.

    Not a bad speller just not caring enough to correct my words but paragraphes are a good idea lol. thx

    Storm - I took this prozac before and i was on a higher dosage my first time which made me sick so this is the right amount it just needs time to kick in.

    I've read up on meditation and deep thinking lucid dreaming all of that stuff but im a very physical person not into anything spiritual or mental when it comes to things like that, do you meditate?

    i live in a realy good house with just my mom and i can see my dad whenever, nothing bad in the family. i was normal but was diagnosed with overactive thyroid in grade 6 and i got fat and depressed cause of that and i couldnt walk from being so dizzy i was extremely sick until it got fixed in grade 9.

    im 6 feet tall and weight 180 pretty big guy (not trying to gloat) but im always non-confrontational and paranoid and nervous. Now im not like that because i realize i have to stand up for myself and my girl. i dont mind fighting but i hate drama that comes with it.

    I also have ocd and i think way to much. everyone says though and even the guidance councelers at school tell me for her to fight her own battles but shes either sometimes dosent care or dosent want to start anything even if its the other persons fault.

    Im attracted to emo/goth kinda girls and sadly the stereotype for all of the ones ive dated are true. they all have mental issues and social issues and most of the time drama. i know my girl dosent start any of it but sadly it comes to her.

    i dont think she goes through more drama than the average person maybe but she knows a lot of ppl and sadly a lot of those ppl are bad influences and white trash. which makes me worry even mroe and more angry when theres a couple in every one of her classes this semester :mad:
     

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