The Sex Offender Registry [Story inside]

Merc

Certified Shitlord
V.I.P.
#1
Personally, this made me sick.

(Full story below)

When I was 21, I went to an 18 and over nightclub with my best friend because he just turned 18. While I was there I met a girl that claimed to be 19 and we exchanged numbers. I hung out at her house with her mom and step-dad there - They knew how old I was and everything. We went out for about 3 months and eventually had sex two or three times. Shortly thereafter, I caught her in a lie one day - She was dating another guy too and I broke up with her.

A few days later I was in the mall walking and holding hands with the girl I had started dating, and was approached by a detective. Having one nothing wrong I went downtown and talked with him. I admitted to knowing her, dating her, and having sex - CONSENSUAL SEX - with her. She had gotten into a fight with the other guy she was dating and he choked her because he had found out about me through the same mutual friend I had found out about him through. Scared, she stated that I had raped her. He told her mom and she called the police. When she talked to the detective, she had told him that she kicked and scratched me repeatedly, but when he looked at me, I didn't have a mark on me. Unfortunately for her, I knew she had told and bragged to her own cousins that we were dating and that she had sex with me - They even signed affidavits to that fact disputing her claim. Unfortunately for me, she was really only 16. She had lied to me and used her sister's license to get in the club, which was verified when the detective questioned both club owners. The detective even found her sister's license in her purse, which he showed me.

I thought I was good to go due to all the facts as I had unknowingly been tricked into committing a crime I would have never committed. To make matters worse, my attorney was a schmuck and advised me to plea to Rape 3 (statutory rape in that state) since I did have sex with her. I had never even had a speeding ticket and was scared shitless and didn't know what to do. I took the plea and due to the affidavits and her own aunt and cousins speaking up at sentencing, the judge only gave me 2 years probation and treatment. I did all of this to completion, then was advised the laws changed and now had to register.


I had a great job and was making a little over $100K a year, but as soon as my picture popped up, I was fired. To date, I have been fired from over 20 jobs, just lost my house I had worked so hard to get, and am completely broke. In two months, I'll be 40. I moved to Colorado and they want me to register for another 5 years! Got my face on the web and all my information... Been on a ton of interviews, got two jobs offers in writing, but then came the background checks and the offers disappeared. How can anyone on earth say this isn't additional punishment? Are they blind? Let me plaster your face on the web with some bullshit and let's see how you handle it!?!

Oh! And by the way, I have two boys that I am a single father to... Had them since they were 7 months and 3 years old - They're 10 and 13 now. I was awarded FULL CUSTODY by the same court that I plead to the charge in. I would just love to see your face when they tell you they would love to play football in the summer, but dad can't afford to buy them the gear and shoes. They don't know why I have a problem finding and keeping a job... They only know what it tastes like to be hungry and have no food. They only know what its like to go outside to play in tennis shoes with their toes hanging out the ends because their feet have worn through. I know they hurt because I've wiped their tears from their cheeks because other kids made fun of their shoes and clothes, or worse... Because their parents said they can't play with them anymore because their dad is "Chester".

When my dad was 16 he went to war and then married my mom when he was 17 - She was 15. My oldest brother was born when she was just 15. I find it odd that most of the people recommending new rules and laws got married young too! I find it odd that people didn't learn when they read the story about the two women claiming to both be the mother of a single child. When Soloman said that since he couldn't tell, they should both get half, the real mother screamed NO, and asked that he be given to the other woman. Soloman, be wise, used the discernment God had given him and gave the child to his rightful mother. I use this story because like Soloman, we have judges that have all of the details of each case. That judge should be capable of discernment. As such, he should be the person making the determination of each individual case and punishment. Grouping everyone into one group will one create paranoia and cause pain. It will never work and until we put the power back into the hands of our judges, we will never find peace in this matter.

Can you imagine if every murderer - including vehicular manslaughter and accidental and unfortunate matters were all of a sudden reclassified and made to register as murderers and violent offenders? Or if everyone convicted of a drug offense - pot smokers, pushers, coke heads, meth heads, and those that gave their friend or relative their prescription medications, were classifed into one big group and made to register as drug abusers? What law makers and legislators are doing is nothing new! They use a case widely publicised in the media - not telling you all the facts and truths - to scare the hell out of you and make you believe every person convicted of a sex offense is going to stalk and rape your little kid. It's out of that fear that we react irrationally. Oops! Two late... The registry is up and now vigilantes are killing those listed on the registry. Unfortunately, they just killed someone that never touched a kid, but they couldn't tell... Not a single detail of the case is published. Same or similar charge, so "they all look alike", right? We need to get a clue before we're all forced to line up and get our "mark" on us or be forced to make more decisions out of fear rather than truth.


Oh! Thought I should let you know... The girl that claimed I raped her recanted after that same guy beat her up really bad and went to prison. I found out over years after the case was closed when she tracked down a friend of mine. He told her how much damage her lie had done to my life and she wrote a letter to the Governor with the complete truth of the matter, even wrote a statement and had it notorized, then sent it to me. I appled for a pardon based on her statement. The Governor didn't even think twice... He denied it and forced me to continue to carry the burden of America's biggest scarlet letter a little longer... THE SEX OFFENDER REGISTRATION.
Long story short: Guy gets tricked by 16-year old into thinking she's older. They become intimate and date for a few months. She cheats, he breaks up with her. She gets beaten by her new boyfriend after he finds out that he was the "other guy" and in her state of panic, tells the cops Guy #1 raped her. Guy #1 is put on sex offender registry and remains there to this day (19 years later) and it suffering financially because his label is preventing him from making money.

He does make a good point though. How come there is no Drug Abuser registry? Or Traffic Violator registry? How come sex crimes are the only crimes that are this heavily policed and corrupted? We've all heard the old joke that you could be put on the sex offender list for pissing in public and this is the same kind of joke. The dude was tricked by a girl wanting to be older and because she got scared, she ruined his life. Now this all could have been prevented, specifically with witnesses stating that they heard her talking about how proud she was to be fooling a 21-year old guy into having sex with her. Yet no judge has overturned this. No attorney will defend him.

Are we this much of a fucked up country that we can't pardon or help a guy who was tricked into committing in crime?

What do you think? Does he deserve to be put on the registry? Should his case have been dismissed? Other thoughts?
 

NINnerd

Survived a M&G with Trent
#2
This seriously pisses me off, too! You can't just lump everyone together. There is a such thing as INTENT! This is what separates manslaughter from murder, etc.

If it is proved that the girl tricked him into thinking she was older, he should NOT have to register as a sex offender.

So sad. :(
 

Wade8813

Registered Member
#3
Sexual crimes where a minor is involved is pretty much the #1 socially stigmatized crime you can commit.

There are tons of stories of people who didn't deserve to be on that list, or only nominally deserved to be, and who have their entire lives ruined because of it.
 

CaptainObvious

Son of Liberty
V.I.P.
#4
Statutory rape is a general intent crime not a specific intent crime, there doesn't need to be intent to commit it, only that it happened. The purpose of the statute is to protect minors who consent to sex with an adult when they're still so young.

Going to the registry, this is why I'm against it, Cons. Once someone is on the registry they're suddenly suspects in crimes in their areas even though they've paid their debt to society. It reminds me of the movie Casablanca when someone says "round up the usual suspects". There are no registries for any other crime even though the recidivism rate can be in some cases higher.

I don't think this kid should be on the registry and I don't think he should have to live with this stigma for what happened. It's a gross miscarriage of justice.
 
Last edited:

WesJones87

RayzorBlade87
#5
He's lived with this for 19 years? Good for him for making it that long. It seems like a pretty fucked up system to me. Especially if the girl has stated that it was a false claim.

The part that made it worse, was that he got fired from all those jobs, and the background checks showed that he was on the register and those job offers went. Surely there should be questioning as to why he was on the register by the employers?

Hope the girl is proud of herself for ruining someones life like that.
 

storm_ina_C_cup

Registered Member
#6
This same exact thing happend to a good (male) friend of mine... He was 25, in the military, he met her at a local Bar, they began chatting, played a game or two of pool and darts; she told him she was 19 years old and when he questioned her on how she got in / served at this bar, she told him that she new someone who made fake ID's.
...Mind you, that's not as terrible as you would think, in fact, everyone I knew used a fake ID when we were 18 / 19 / 20 years of age but I don't ever remember any of us having a fake ID at her (real) age.

Anyway, they saw eachother a couple times after meeting that night, I recall him phoning me one night and saying, "She's a sweet girl but that's all she is, I want someone I have something in common with, someone I can have a somewhat intelligent conversation with, someone who doesn't giggle when we have sex". (etc.) And that's when I asked him, "Are you sure she's 19 and not younger"? And he said, "There's no doubt in my mind she's any younger than what she says she is, you've seen her, she looks 19". And she did! I never in a million years thought she looked any younger than an 18 / 19 year old female!

...A few days later he broke things off with her for the same reasons he expressed to me. To make a long story short, she got pissed off, told her mother and father she was "raped", her parents took it to his First Sgt. and that's all she wrote!!!. . .He was kicked out of the military for statutory rape and had to serve time for his crime.

She turned out to be only 15 years old.
 

Merc

Certified Shitlord
V.I.P.
#7
Statutory rape is a general intent crime not a specific intent crime, there doesn't need to be intent to commit it, only that it happened. The purpose of the statute is to protect minors who consent to sex with an adult when they're still so young.
I understand the intent to protect the minor, but what about the person who didn't even know they were committing a crime and instead were tricked into thinking what they were doing was actually illegal?
 

CaptainObvious

Son of Liberty
V.I.P.
#8
I understand the intent to protect the minor, but what about the person who didn't even know they were committing a crime and instead were tricked into thinking what they were doing was actually illegal?
I know, I was referring to NIN's post about intent. Unfortunately there are going to be cases like these but to change the intent to what is required under the crime of rape would mean adults can have sex with minors all they want so long as it's consensual.

My problem is with the registry, not with the crime itself. What he did was a crime. I just don't think he should be paying for it the rest of his life.
 

Merc

Certified Shitlord
V.I.P.
#9
I know, I was referring to NIN's post about intent. Unfortunately there are going to be cases like these but to change the intent to what is required under the crime of rape would mean adults can have sex with minors all they want so long as it's consensual.
But is it really consensual if you're tricked into it? I can't speak for this guy, but I'd have to imagine this guy wouldn't have slept with her if she was honest about her age. That has to be important in a case like this and there has to be some way around the whole issue of consent if it executed under false pretenses. I understand and support the need for statutory rape as a crime but if you ask me, it only exists by definition in this story. He was lied to and essentially taken advantage of yet she has suffered nothing for it while he has lived a life where people hide their children from him.
 

storm_ina_C_cup

Registered Member
#10
I know, I was referring to NIN's post about intent. Unfortunately there are going to be cases like these but to change the intent to what is required under the crime of rape would mean adults can have sex with minors all they want so long as it's consensual.

My problem is with the registry, not with the crime itself. What he did was a crime. I just don't think he should be paying for it the rest of his life.
How is it a crime if she led him to believe she was older than she really was?

In this particular circumstance, I do not see this as a crime he committed- he was led under false pretenses therefore should not have to pay the consequences due to a stupid little girl who wanted to get her revenge.
...Now, if it were some paedo pushing himself on, violating and raping an under-aged child that's an entirely different story imo... Hang that prick by his nuts and stone him to death.