The child of a raper.

Discussion in 'Politics & Law' started by EllyDicious, Apr 24, 2010.

  1. EllyDicious

    EllyDicious made of AMBIGUITY V.I.P. Lifetime

    The thread about that 11-y.o girl who was raped by her stepfather made me create this thread.

    Am I wrong in thinking that I wouldn't be able to keep the child of my raper though I knew it wasn't child's fault...?
    That the child would always remind me of his dad and my raper at the same and probably the moment during during the act of rape ?
    That the child would have the father's blood and could also have the same sexual instincts and commit raping someday , later in life ... regardless of the righteous education I could give him/her?

    How would you feel about the child?
    [sorry for sounding judgmental].

    Note: This thread is not about abortion, not about health problems regarding before/after abortion, not about age or any other problem rather than about mother's psychological way of seeing the conceived child as a result of rape.
     
    Last edited: Apr 24, 2010

  2. Tucker

    Tucker Lion Rampant

    I would never judge any woman faced with a decision like that. I'm not sure the tendency for sexual crime passes down through the DNA, but I could understand not being able to bond in that case.

    I once lived with a mother-in-law who was born in a Spanish prison after a guard raped her mother during the Revolution. (The mother was there only because her husband had been Governor of Aragon province.) I know how hard it was for my then-MIL to feel the basic self-worth we all take for granted. So, as much as I feel the pain of, and will advocate for, every last victim of rape, I can also imagine the innocent child growing up feeling punished and abandoned for something she didn't do. I simply hope that women caught in this heartbreaking dilemma will weigh the future needs of the child into whatever decision is ultimately made.
     
  3. Oooh_snap

    Oooh_snap Living on the 0th floor V.I.P. Lifetime

    I know in my case, that I would be able to love the child and give it a happy, healthy life like I would a planned child. I would most likely keep the baby since I would have the strength to help my child understand that they should have no guilty, they are a blessing, and they are still my wonderful child.

    I also wouldn't be worried about something to that nature being passed down through DNA. I suppose it is a possibility, but that is where Nature Vs. Nurture comes into play and I feel like giving a child a happy home is 90% of the battle.

    I can see how a woman couldn't keep the child because it would remind them of their attack, but I guess I typically have a different outlook on life than a lot of people and would not be stuck thinking about that, but rather my child. I would never judge someone for feeling that way, but I would if they kept the child knowing they would feel upset every time they looked in their baby's face. If you know your life will be miserable because of your child you would only make them miserable, so I could respect terminating the pregnancy or adoption if the woman felt she could make it through the 9 months to deliver.
     
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  4. idisrsly

    idisrsly I'm serious V.I.P. Lifetime

    Snap, you are a better person than most. I don't think I would be able to keep that child as a reminder. That would not be fair on me or the child. I would most likely go the adoption route.
     
  5. KSpiceFantastic

    KSpiceFantastic Haters gonna hate.

    If I was in the position of which you mentioned, I would try to make it work, but if problems are taking place, and too much stress is evident, then adoption is the way to go.
     
  6. Boredie

    Boredie In need of Entertainment

    As Curious said, I could not raise a child conceived in that way.
    I would give it up for adoption.
     
  7. JessEpiphany

    JessEpiphany Registered Member

    I think that would be a very personal decision for a woman to make and only she knows what she can handle.

    I don't know how I would deal with a situation like that.
     
  8. Iris

    Iris rainbow 11!

    I honestly can't say what I would do for sure. I could say that I would have an abortion... But I'm against abortion. (I believe everyone should have the choice)

    I don't know if I could go through the nine months of being pregnant. I think I would try, but I wouldn't be able to say if I would keep her/him until the day I had my child. I think it would be at that moment that I would be able to really choose.
     
  9. Merc

    Merc Certified Shitlord V.I.P. Lifetime

    I'm obviously not wishing it on anybody, but I can't see anyone making a real answer without being faced with the situation. That being said, I'm sure there are people that would be able to raise the child. There are also going to be people that would be traumatized to a point that seeing their child would become a constant reminder. It's one of the reasons I support abortion especially in this type of situation.
     
  10. stevenfermi

    stevenfermi Registered Member

    It's always a very painful issue for the mother. It is hard, and only those with a very high tolerance and capacity for love, for a mother to look everyday at a product of violence. To that, I say poor kid, and poor mother.
     

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