Report: Swift banned from St Louis


Staff member
In a recent story, local TV effiliate Channel 5 KSDK had been reporting yesterday, it appears "Swiftstrike," also known as "Swift" to some of his closest "friends," has been banned from ever stepping foot in the lovely city of St Louis, Missouri. The mayor had this to say...

"Here in St Louis we hold people accountable for their actions and personalities. Not just any ole douchebag can walk into our city and hope to be one of us. This Swift character appears unstable, mentality retarded, and there's a rumor going around that he cannot control his bladder, refuses to wear a diaper and smells unbelievably terrible. That is NOT the kind of person who you want in your city."

The economy is bad and some residents feel its not a good idea to stop people from entering our city and possibly putting money into the local economy. Local resident Doras Frankentin had this to say.

"I say let the lunatic come to our town, we could use more people like him and spending money on crack and whores. The male prostitutes need loving too!"

When asked for a comment on this manner Swift simply sniffled and walked away with no comment. He was apparently crying and had obviously soiled his shorts.

More to come as we get additional information.
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Registered Member
Why would I wanna go to St. Louis. Buncha horsebanging, cousin-loving, gun-toting, bible thumping (and humping) rednecks live there.

Or maybe Millz just gives them a bad image.