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Read my Story On My website!


Registered Member
I read your story and I feel your pain.

But I must tell you, that if you are looking for closure........ you need to create it for yourself.

You cannot change the past. The only thing you can do is change the way you deal with it. You cannot move forward into the future, walking backwards looking at the past.

If you believe in God, which it seems that you do, you need to ask for strength and create good for yourself from this in some way. For your own family and for other people.

Maybe you are supposed to write a book, or help other people and families that lose loved ones to drugs and murders. But out of this, you need to move forward.

I'm so sorry for you that you are hurting. I know it must be difficult. But you need to embrace life and be happy to be alive.

God Bless.


Registered Member
TatAD said:
Maybe you are supposed to write a book, or help other people and families that lose loved ones to drugs and murders. But out of this, you need to move forward.


I thought that A LOT myself!! I just dont know WHAT I am suppose to do!! I have felt strongly at times that I needed to tell his story in Church....but I have not yet. I have reach out to others who have lost loved ones. I do want to help others and let them know there IS someone out there that knows what they are going through!!!


Registered Member

I really think that you should ask God for some guidance. I recently lost my best friend from 25 years, who was also my business partner and my soul brother.

He is the first friend that I have ever lost in my life. Although he is not here physically, I really don't feel like I have lost him in my life. His presence is here everyday and he often shows the presence of his spirit in strange happenings around my house.

If you focus on all of the positive times and picture your husbands smile, it will surround you with white light and you will start to see his presence in all of the beautiful things around you in nature.

I understand the position you are in, but in order to move on you need to set your emotions free and relinquish.

If you can get enough courage to tell his story in church, I think it would help in your healing. You may also want to consider speaking at a detox center or rehabilitation house.

God Bless
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Registered Member
Hmm I never thought of speaking at a Detox center......

As for remembering good times. I can now, but for awhile after the murder it was SO hard for me to remember the good times cause there were so many months of awful awful times with him........but i know it was because of the drugs.......

I miss him alot. It is strange to one day have your soul mate there with you, sharing your bed, your memories, your love and the next day its all gone.....

Thank you for your suggestions.......I take them all to heart!!