Please give Advice

Im 16 and i live with my parents. I feel powerless and am on a verge of a breakdown. I have a history of drug and alcohal abuse, and am on an antidepressant. I cannot stand living with my dad. The pressure to get all A's in difficult advanced placement classes is destroying me. Every B on a test, every single little thing pushes me closer to the edge. He is ridiculous about everything and he has a short fuse. I go to a psycologist and psychiatrist on a regular basis, but nothing ever helps, nor does the medication. I dont open up to either because i always feel ashamed to tLK about my feelings or my drug abuse which continues to this day. I feel like i always need something to relieve the constant stress im under. I dont think i can come clean with my psycologist because i have kept up this fascade so long. How should i deal with this stress or who do i talk to abuout it. I've asked my dad to go to a new psycologist but it hasnt happened yet, and i feel like i really cant take it anymore. The stress has caused me severe insomnia, which i now have a perscription for. My dad does not learn that i am not a perfect child. I dont have any motivation to become rich and succesful. I just want to be somewhat happy. Is that too much to ask? Who should i talk to, or how should i relive my stress


still nobody's bitch
That's what your psychologist is there for. If you can't trust him/her, then go to your school counselor. good luck.


Boom Boom Pow!
Have you ever tried talking to your Dad about how you feel? Maybe he would understand if he knew how much strees this whole situation is causing. You should tell him that you just want to earn a good standard of life nothing too fancy. If he won't listen is your mum around to speak to? Maybe she could help?

I think the best thing to do is come clean to your psycologist about your drug abuse. The first step to improving yourself is to admit that you have the problem so you can get the right help that you need. The more you hide away from it the worse it will get until it is too late.
How do i come clean with a psycologist whom i have been bullshitting for the past 6 months, in a one hour session every week. It feels unforgiveable and im ashamed.


Boom Boom Pow!
I'm sure he/she will understand. That's what they are there for. If they don't understand or at least try and understand why you did it then I guess they are a pretty rubbish psycologist. They won't chuck you out their office or yell at you. Nothing bad can happen to you if you come clean. They will end up helping you more if you come clean.
But even when im happy i feel like i need some stress relief. Im always looking for the next high and it has more or less become my life. I dont feel like depression is the issue, but i feel if i say i need anxeity relief i will be accused of trying to get free pills (Xanax an such) which are typically abuseable. Even if i did get them i dont know if i could control myself having them in the house


Certified Shitlord
Do you have any friends that you can confide in? Also, is there a reason you don't like your therapist? Do you just not like the idea of it or do you not like the person him/herself?
How do i come clean with a psycologist whom i have been bullshitting for the past 6 months, in a one hour session every week. It feels unforgiveable and im ashamed.
Its completely pointless going to your psychologist unless you're going to get something positive out of it. I do sympathise with you, but you have to starting actively working towards changing your situation, there is no magical way out.

Maybe you could write a letter in your own time, and hand it to your psychologist? I know it's easy to say, but you should not be ashamed for who you are. Accepting yourself is the first step forward and moving on with your life. You are your own person and not this perfect child your dad wants you to be.. jeez, talk about pressure.


/ˈɪzəˌbɛl/ pink 5
One reason that "nothing ever helps, nor does the medication" is that you aren't being honest with your situation for months. Although unless you're a really good actor, your therapist might have already sensed you were bullshitting and is just waiting for you to come clean. If you're not comfortable with him/her then look into replacements. Also, look into your entourage (other family members or close friends) you can talk to when you're feeling stressed.