Parents Interference ?

Discussion in 'Parenting' started by EllyDicious, Oct 16, 2009.

  1. EllyDicious

    EllyDicious made of AMBIGUITY V.I.P. Lifetime

    -Has there been times when parents have interfered about one thing or many things in your life? about your choices in anything?
    (school/work/social life)?

    -If they don't support our choices, does it mean they're interfering?

    *****************************************************
    my 18 year old cousin wants to move in with his girlfriend [she's 2 years older, a mom (of a 2 year old girl), getting divorced. she and my cousin have been together for only 9 months now. ] :shifteyes: .
    he says he loves her, that he's ready to do anything for her.. [this makes me laugh].
    his mom doesn't agree with this whole situation and his choices and he says she's interfering and wants her to leave him alone.
    This girl seems to be a total bitch in every possible meaning... but this dumbass of my cousin is falling head over heels for her... :shake: [that's a typical case when a 18 y.o "kid" feels a grown up ..:rolleyes:]
    **********************************************************

    -Is it really an interference from his mom?
    -What would you do if you were his parent? [would you be able to let him go and make stupid mistakes and "support" his choice?]
    -What's the meaning of "supporting" the kid, to you?
    -What would you do if you were in my cousin's shoes, though?
     

  2. Jaszibabes

    Jaszibabes The Instigator V.I.P. Lifetime

    -Has there been times when parents have interfered about one thing or many things in your life? about your choices in anything?

    Interfered... No. I never thought my parents tried to interfere in anything I did. But that doesn't mean they didn't disagree, and voice their opinion.

    -If they don't support our choices, does it mean they're interfering?

    No, I don't consider that interfering, unless they try to do whatever they can to change my mind. Then, I would get annoyed. But, I don't need their support or permission for anything, it's just nice to have if they want to give it. Haha.

    -
    Is it really an interference from his mom?

    Is his mother trying to do something about it? If she just disagrees with it, but let's him do his own thing, then it's not interfering.

    -What would you do if you were his parent? [would you be able to let him go and make stupid mistakes and "support" his choice?]

    I wouldn't support it no, but I also wouldn't try to get in his way. When you're 18, you're on your own (I'm assuming that's how it is where you are?) My parents can't tell me what to do anymore now that I'm an 'adult'. I would just let him make his own mistakes, and if/when he realizes it was the wrong move, I would be there to support him.

    -What's the meaning of "supporting" the kid, to you?

    Exactly what I just said. Being there when he/she needs you.

    -What would you do if you were in my cousin's shoes, though?

    Well, for one thing, I wouldn't be moving in with someone who I've been with for only 9 months. Let alone someone going through a divorce.

    I don't think your cousin is really thinking things through enough, but that's typical.
     
    Last edited: Oct 16, 2009
  3. Jeanie

    Jeanie still nobody's bitch V.I.P. Lifetime

    If it were my child, I'd let him make his own mistakes. All you can do as a parent is teach your kids the right way to live their lives, and if they listen, great, if not, well you can't live their lives for them.
     
  4. EllyDicious

    EllyDicious made of AMBIGUITY V.I.P. Lifetime

    that's the issue. when you reach 18 you think you know everything and you think you can make it on your own. you don't think things through enough and sometimes it happens that you make the biggest mistake of your life...a mistake that's gonna cost your for the rest of your life.
    Legally you may be an adult, but mentally you're not. you're still a kid, a teenager...


    what does it mean? if i become a prostitute and you're my mom, would you be there for me to support my choice?



    i think parents don't have to support anything their child does...because that's the difference between a child and a parent.
    just like Jeanie said, you tell him what's right/wrong but if he doesn't agree..then there's nothing you can do.
    but this doesn't mean you have to support him, .. right?
     
  5. Unfaithful

    Unfaithful New Member

    I guess our parents have done something they regret in their life time. And, They want us to be different to them. They're making sure we choice the correct choices in life. They want to see their kids grow up being successful.
     
  6. Mirage

    Mirage Administrator Staff Member V.I.P.

    If your kid is walking out into the street in front of a truck you wouldn't just sit there and let them learn from their mistakes. There are plenty of less extreme examples where a parent should still care enough to do something.

    Some mistakes will cause lifelong problems. A loving parent wouldn't just sit there and watch. If your kid is living with you then you have the right to interfere and set rules for how they will live their life if you ask me. If they don't like it they can move out. Simple as that.
     
    EllyDicious likes this.
  7. EllyDicious

    EllyDicious made of AMBIGUITY V.I.P. Lifetime

    totally agreed ! and i hate it when the child seeks for parent's support all the time..
    it shows immaturity.
     
  8. Anthony1975

    Anthony1975 Registered Member

    As people will say there is nothing wrong with a parent giving advice or try to point their child in the right direction so to speak, but at the end of the day it is the kids life to fuck up as they please.
     
  9. Eddie

    Eddie New Member

    my parents pretty much let me do whatever the hell I want.
     
  10. EllyDicious

    EllyDicious made of AMBIGUITY V.I.P. Lifetime

    how old are you, btw?
     

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