Ok...What Do I Do?

Discussion in 'Advice Board' started by Pugz, Nov 23, 2006.

  1. Pugz

    Pugz Ms. Malone V.I.P. Lifetime

    Ok...so i get a message on myspace from my ex asking how i was and all that, being casual and said if i still hated him it was ok. So i sent one back saying i didn't hate him but i was mad at him and wanted an explination to why he ignored me for two weeks before we broke up.

    He sent another back saying he was mad at me for not talking to him for 2 weeks (which i don't remember doing) and obviously decided to do the same to me. I sent one back saying he should have dumped me if he felt like that rather than doing what he did.

    When i got another he said he was sorry he got so mad about it and didn't mean to hate me, he said he wanted to make it up to me and make me happy again (we broke up about 5 months ago, by the way).

    I asked him how he was going to do that and i'm waiting on a reply. I don't know if i should forgive him. I don't remember ever ignoring him but i remember going through a hard time while we were dating. So...what do i do?
     

  2. Dr. Fresh

    Dr. Fresh Mmmm.... Lesbians.

    Let me ask you this, how was your relationship, overall? If it was good, forgive him, I know I would rather forgive someone and be on good terms with someone rather than hate and dislike someone and be an enemy. It just makes everyone feel so much better. However, if you really don't want to forgive him or whatever, then you don't have to. Have HIM apologize to you as well and so foth. Make sure everything is alright between both of yall and then just be friendly.
     
  3. Pugz

    Pugz Ms. Malone V.I.P. Lifetime

    The relationship was...ok, we had fun together. It was the way it ended that was the problem, i told him (not so nicely) to get lost over the phone when he didn't turn up to meet me. I didn't like one of his friends either.
     
  4. Dr. Fresh

    Dr. Fresh Mmmm.... Lesbians.

    Well then, it would be appropriate to forgive him, move on, and become friends once again.
     
  5. Hoosier_Daddy

    Hoosier_Daddy Registered Member

    Pugz:

    I'd suggest a good sitdown with him where you two can air things out face to face. It sounds like there wasn't a big problem, but rather a lack of communication that deteriorated the relationship. When the two of you get together to talk this out remember that it doesn't have to be an 'all or nothing' conversation. By that I mean don't go into it thinking you'll have to leave the meeting either as a couple or as enemies. I'm sure you'll find a mid-ground to work with if you just talk it out.


    Hoosier.
     
  6. Illosophee

    Illosophee Guest

    Well, just let him know how you feel. If he doesn't show compassion toward your feelings, don't forgive him. In other words, if he acts like he doesn't care about how you felt about him ignoring you, just let it be. Don't speak to him, ignore him, etc. If he does show some compassion, give him a reasonable doubt... Just forgive him then.
     
  7. Pugz

    Pugz Ms. Malone V.I.P. Lifetime

    It's sorted and nothing's changed. Cheers anyway guys.
     
  8. deltabtry

    deltabtry Guest

    If your on this forum asking for advice, then it wasn't meant to be. If you truly liked or I dare say loved this man, you will know it without a doubt, and the same goes for him. Look into yourself and remember how you felt when dating him, was it a effort or did it come easily..was there communication and trust, ALL THE TIME.
     
  9. Forgiveness is always the best policy in all relationships.
    This does not mean you need to capitulate or give in on any point of contention.
    Hurt and Anger are like an open wound, Love and Forgiveness are the only salve that can heal those types of open wounds.
    Think of it this way, even if you forgave and never mentioned it, the open wound in your heart would heal, allowing you to continue on with life.
     

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