• Welcome to the PopMalt Forums! Whether you're new to forums or a veteran, welcome to our humble home on the web! We're a 20-year old forum community with thousands of discussions on entertainment, lifestyle, leisure, and more.

    Our rules are simple. Be nice and don't spam. Registration is free, so what are you waiting for? Join today!.

Odd English !

Shrek

Registered Member
Let's face it--English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant or ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple...

English muffins were not invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.

We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce, and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So, one moose, 2 meese? One index, two indices? Is cheese the plural of choose?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

In what language do people recite at a play, and play at a recital? Ship by truck, and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? Park on driveways and drive on parkways?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?

When a house burns up, it burns down. You fill in a form by filling it out, and an alarm clock goes off by going on.

When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible. And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it?

Now I know why I flunked my English. it's not my fault but the silly language doesn't quite know whether it's coming or going.


Source: GigglePedia
 

Teorropy

Registered User
I have always felt the same way.

A driveway is were your park, a parkway is were you drive. It doesn't make sense.

A word spelled the same has to different meanins. Pound, I will pound in this nail, I weight one pound. aaaghhh.
 

Mirage

Secret Agent
Staff member
V.I.P.
Or you can read a book, and when you are done you've read it.

The English language has to be so hard to learn. I'd be so annoyed because it has so many inconsistencies.
 

Psyco

Food Whore
I have always felt the same way.

A driveway is were your park, a parkway is were you drive. It doesn't make sense.

A word spelled the same has to different meanins. Pound, I will pound in this nail, I weight one pound. aaaghhh.
Parkways were actually originally through parks, literally. They were always surrounded with forests/grass/etc to make it a nice thing to look at when you drive.
 

neum985

I pwn noobs
I agree the English language is so tough. If it made any sense it would be like one of the other languages in the world where there is a rule therefore making it easier to learn. Don't know if its just me but i believe that the whole world should just switch to one language. I would be willing to learn another language if we dint choose English and i think that it would be a lot easier to deal with people from all over the world.
 

oxyMORON

A Darker Knight
like cargo goes on ships, while shipments go on cars/trucks? :D
 

Malificus

Likes snow
Deceptively is a contradiction in and of itself. If a pool is deceptively deep, does that mean it's deeper than it seems, or shallower? Nobody knows, not even linguists.

However, this does let you get language anal on eveyone who has ever used deceptively.
 

Malificus

Likes snow
congratulations? Way to state the irrelevant.
 
Top