TGirl
Registered Member
Here is a long story about my situation if anyone is interested...
Well most of you know I been in the process of Adopting my son Austen.....I have had Austen since he was 9 months old...he is now 2 years old.....
The parental Termination Trial was in the first of March....after a 4 day trial (which I was there every second) the Judge ruled for Austen’s Bio Mom's rights to be terminated! Now I had nothing at all to do with this process other than keeping Austen safe while they did what they could do to help train mom to take care of a child.....She was unable to retain the information after all this time.....this is her Second child that she has had taken away for neglect...
After the Termination paper work is filed with the court by the State Attorney the Bio mom as 30 days to appeal the judges decision....if it is appealed it can take up to two years for the appeal to be heard by a panel of judges...and that long for the adoption to be completed.
I cried for two reasons when the judge ruled....one that I was finally going to be able to adopt him and the other being his Bio Mom was so sad and it broke my heart.....Austen’s Bio Mom loves him very much and I have not doubt about that, she is just dysfunctionaly disabled and can not care for him...and has no family around to help her....she barley makes it on her own!
Some History.....
When Austen came to live with us The Social worker called me at work and asked if I would take him...I said of course (our first baby) the social worker said "do you want to look at him first before you decide" and I got real offended by that...I said "NO, I do not need to look at him to decide...I will come get him now!" the social worker went on to tell me that this child does nothing not even SMILE.....
I showed up at the DCFS office to pick him up and the social worker met me at the front of the building holding this beautiful chubby little boy and I walked over to him and smiled and said "Hi Austen" and Austen smiled so big at me and leaned over for me to hold him......The social worker said "NO WAYYYYYYY, I can't believe this...This is meant to be".....Not knowing then that I would be adopting him....I just thought a long the lines of purely foster care! I looked him over and he had a horribly flat head from not being picked up or turned over...all he did was lay there and eat.....at 9 months old he could not sit up by himself or even crawl or nothing...he just laid there like a 29 pound beached whale.....the only thing he knew to do was hold his bottle and cry this hysterical cry every time we left the room...that was from being left alone to much...we thought he had his mom's disability, because he was horribly delayed.
After working so hard with him...two months went by and he was crawling and giggling. Picking things off the ground,....he was doing what any 7 month old would be doing....but then he was almost a year old.... AND NOW man he is a two years old for sure.....and he is a normal two year old I want to lock in a cage....totally into everything!
Ok I said termination was in march right....well the "STATE" who worked so hard to get the termination done never filed the paper work after all this time....not the social workers....not the DCFS officials...The "State"!! I kept getting promises on times and date for things to take place....Stories about some distant relatives that want him and got my attorney's on that as we have just as much blood as they do....but we have one thing they didn't have and that was "A BOND".....Well it is August now and MY SON NEEDS PERMENANTCY!!! Sooo finally I called the State Attorney last week after trying everyone else all this time......and I didn't ask questions...I just stated facts.....that I was going to Contact our State Senator and I was going to have to file a petition against the state for sitting on this! That it is a mandatory state law for a child that has been in the foster care system for over 12 months to gain permanency....whether going home to bio parents or being adopted. (unless unusual situation acures)...but Termination has already taken place...just the paperwork was never filed.... uggggggggg
So this last Tuesday I get a call from the adoption worker that the State attorney is filing the paper work at that very moment and that now all we have to do is a few more things that takes about 6 weeks and Austen will be all mine........So I think finally this is gunna happen............TODAY I get a call from the adoption worker stating that they didn't file and they are not going to until September 2nd in front of a judge...
Uggggggggggg WHY????...just file the damn paperwork....there is no reason to do this in front of a judge...there is nothing to judge!!! This is not even a common practice and of course we still have to wait the 30 days from September 2nd now incase bio mom wants to appeal!!! I think to myself GOD has given me this child....hardly ever is there a time that there IS NO direct family members that wont take a baby....there is none for Austen and now Austen is OUR son...I am just so frustrated with the system right now...they take these babies away from their mama's (most the time for good reason) and then they terminate the rights to give a child permanency and NOW they want to sit around and do nothing??? I feel like they want the mom to appeal.....they want to spend more money on this case......and in the meantime we are in limbo wondering if this is even going to take place....
I have spent a ton of money on this adoption already and I will spend a ton more if I have too..... Austen is my son! And I have no doubt in my mind a judge would ever take him from us as he believes we are his parents.
Ok I think I am done venting....I am just so frustrated and sad right now, not to mention two of my other foster children I have had for a year and a half are leaving the end of this month to a Adoptive mom and dad......its a bitter sweet thing!
~Trina~
Well most of you know I been in the process of Adopting my son Austen.....I have had Austen since he was 9 months old...he is now 2 years old.....
The parental Termination Trial was in the first of March....after a 4 day trial (which I was there every second) the Judge ruled for Austen’s Bio Mom's rights to be terminated! Now I had nothing at all to do with this process other than keeping Austen safe while they did what they could do to help train mom to take care of a child.....She was unable to retain the information after all this time.....this is her Second child that she has had taken away for neglect...
After the Termination paper work is filed with the court by the State Attorney the Bio mom as 30 days to appeal the judges decision....if it is appealed it can take up to two years for the appeal to be heard by a panel of judges...and that long for the adoption to be completed.
I cried for two reasons when the judge ruled....one that I was finally going to be able to adopt him and the other being his Bio Mom was so sad and it broke my heart.....Austen’s Bio Mom loves him very much and I have not doubt about that, she is just dysfunctionaly disabled and can not care for him...and has no family around to help her....she barley makes it on her own!
Some History.....
When Austen came to live with us The Social worker called me at work and asked if I would take him...I said of course (our first baby) the social worker said "do you want to look at him first before you decide" and I got real offended by that...I said "NO, I do not need to look at him to decide...I will come get him now!" the social worker went on to tell me that this child does nothing not even SMILE.....
I showed up at the DCFS office to pick him up and the social worker met me at the front of the building holding this beautiful chubby little boy and I walked over to him and smiled and said "Hi Austen" and Austen smiled so big at me and leaned over for me to hold him......The social worker said "NO WAYYYYYYY, I can't believe this...This is meant to be".....Not knowing then that I would be adopting him....I just thought a long the lines of purely foster care! I looked him over and he had a horribly flat head from not being picked up or turned over...all he did was lay there and eat.....at 9 months old he could not sit up by himself or even crawl or nothing...he just laid there like a 29 pound beached whale.....the only thing he knew to do was hold his bottle and cry this hysterical cry every time we left the room...that was from being left alone to much...we thought he had his mom's disability, because he was horribly delayed.
After working so hard with him...two months went by and he was crawling and giggling. Picking things off the ground,....he was doing what any 7 month old would be doing....but then he was almost a year old.... AND NOW man he is a two years old for sure.....and he is a normal two year old I want to lock in a cage....totally into everything!
Ok I said termination was in march right....well the "STATE" who worked so hard to get the termination done never filed the paper work after all this time....not the social workers....not the DCFS officials...The "State"!! I kept getting promises on times and date for things to take place....Stories about some distant relatives that want him and got my attorney's on that as we have just as much blood as they do....but we have one thing they didn't have and that was "A BOND".....Well it is August now and MY SON NEEDS PERMENANTCY!!! Sooo finally I called the State Attorney last week after trying everyone else all this time......and I didn't ask questions...I just stated facts.....that I was going to Contact our State Senator and I was going to have to file a petition against the state for sitting on this! That it is a mandatory state law for a child that has been in the foster care system for over 12 months to gain permanency....whether going home to bio parents or being adopted. (unless unusual situation acures)...but Termination has already taken place...just the paperwork was never filed.... uggggggggg
So this last Tuesday I get a call from the adoption worker that the State attorney is filing the paper work at that very moment and that now all we have to do is a few more things that takes about 6 weeks and Austen will be all mine........So I think finally this is gunna happen............TODAY I get a call from the adoption worker stating that they didn't file and they are not going to until September 2nd in front of a judge...
Uggggggggggg WHY????...just file the damn paperwork....there is no reason to do this in front of a judge...there is nothing to judge!!! This is not even a common practice and of course we still have to wait the 30 days from September 2nd now incase bio mom wants to appeal!!! I think to myself GOD has given me this child....hardly ever is there a time that there IS NO direct family members that wont take a baby....there is none for Austen and now Austen is OUR son...I am just so frustrated with the system right now...they take these babies away from their mama's (most the time for good reason) and then they terminate the rights to give a child permanency and NOW they want to sit around and do nothing??? I feel like they want the mom to appeal.....they want to spend more money on this case......and in the meantime we are in limbo wondering if this is even going to take place....
I have spent a ton of money on this adoption already and I will spend a ton more if I have too..... Austen is my son! And I have no doubt in my mind a judge would ever take him from us as he believes we are his parents.
Ok I think I am done venting....I am just so frustrated and sad right now, not to mention two of my other foster children I have had for a year and a half are leaving the end of this month to a Adoptive mom and dad......its a bitter sweet thing!
~Trina~