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Missing out

thealigator

Registered Member
What of the main problems when it comes to my depression and anxiety is the overwhelming idea that I am constantly missing out. I check my phone, no-one has text me. I look on Facebook, no one has messaged me. I text friends, no-one comes back to me. It's okay right? They must be busy. They probably are doing som... what a minute! They just CHECKED IN! They just posted a photo in a bar! With people I know! And I wasn't invited! Those no good dirty sonsofbitches.

I think you see my point. really gets to me this idea that I am somehow missing out on something great and that I am being ignored by people I know and are supposed to be my friend (see, even now I am putting negative emotions on what is basically a metaphorical situation). I know this is all in my head, I know I need to remove and I know that in reality it just doesn't matter. I think it would be worse if I confronted anyone about this or if I saw that someone I knew was in a place and just "popped in", woah, what a coincidence, you're here as well? Mind if I join you.

I am not expecting an answer from anyone to fix my problem. It is my issue, I need to get over this and I need to banish my own demons but is anyone else this way inclined? I am fairly certain I am not alone in this and just knowing I am not alone would help me no end.

Many thanks for listening.
 

Hilander

Free Spirit
Staff member
V.I.P.
I've gotten the brush off before and I made new friends.
 

Bubbles

I ♥ Haters
That's the thing about depression... It's that one stupid disease that makes you isolate yourself from people and then makes you feel shitty as fuck when you realize that your friends are doing things without you. As someone whose been struggling with it for a couple of years now, I can totally relate.

I reckon the best thing you can do is try to reconnect with your friends. Trust me, it may seem like it's hard to do but at least try giving it a shot. I recently reconnected with some friends after going through some periods of isolation and it was a very refreshing change. Give it a go. Your friends will be happy to hear from you.... unless they're complete assholes. And if they are, fuck them. Make some new friends or start dating again. I realize that's easier said than done.

Worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but takes you nowhere. Again, totally speaking fro experience here. Things will definitely get better; they'll just require a bit of effort on your part before they do. Good luck out there.
 

NewGamePlus

Registered Member
I am not expecting an answer from anyone to fix my problem. It is my issue, I need to get over this and I need to banish my own demons but is anyone else
Too bad. You're going to get one.

Go find them and make sure everything's ok. Could be anything from an oversight to something no one's told you yet. Get closure at least. At least try.
 

thealigator

Registered Member
Oh I believe that it most likely is. It is my own neurosis that get in the way and I know that this is purely down to me. To blame anyone for this other than myself I feel would be short sighted. I agree with you, closure is an important thing. I think I am trying to train my brain to think "if I don't know find out. If I am unwilling to do that move on." I think unless I am willing to do either it won't fix it y'know?
 

BJBirdy

Registered Member
This happened to me when I was younger a lot. Then I decided just to have even more fun and brag about it even more than everyone else.
 

Twitch

Registered Member
Is there a chance they don't think you want to go out?

Many of my friends are much more out-going than me. Some of the time when they're going to bars, and especially parties back in college, they wouldn't even think to invite me because they knew I was at home, either alone or maybe with a friend, just hanging out. I've never been the "it would've been nice if you asked" kind of people, maybe they feel the same about you?
 

BJBirdy

Registered Member
That could be it as well. I've had people tell me "I would've asked you to go but I figured you'd say no" and I could tell they actually meant it instead of just giving me some sort of lip service. On top of that, some people just have the same social anxieties you have (maybe not you in particular, but I mean "you" in the general sense), and figure they're not good enough to ask you to hang out.
 
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