I want to be the first guy on here to be completely honest about something we all know. Men suck. We treat you women like crap, in almost all cases. And you women are stupid (desperate? hopeful? naive?) enough to believe that we will actually be good to you, when 9 times out of 10, we won't. We won't call. And when we do, we'll be mean to you. Which, strangely enough, will make you want us more. We'll give you some attention, but only when it's convenient for us to do so. We'll play mind games and keep you guessing constantly as to where you stand. We'll laugh when we make you cry, and we'll go play our Xboxes while you call your girlfriends and complain about us. Then, if you're lucky, after you've spent the best years of your life wasted on jerks, you might find a guy that's reached the magical age where he realizes his own mortality and doesn't want to die alone. So he'll express some genuine interest in you and want to actually maintain a healthy relationship. Good luck.
I'm guessing you've been through something recently, man? Without that post being fueled by emotion and context, I wouldn't see how you'd be so (no insult meant, I know it might not sound like it) bitter sounding and using stereotypes. Anyway, if there is something relationship-related that you want to vent/talk to people about, this is a good place. Welcome!
Haha, yeah, I completely disagree. There are way too many individual differences in both men and woman to go around making claims like that. Some girls treat guys like crap; it works both ways.
Thank you! :nod: People are all different, the P.O.V. that men are insensitive a-holes and that women are needy and/or naive are antiquated and wrong. I don't like when people generalize because it disservices everyone and I pity that they're missing out on a realistic view of life.
It's a slippery slope, that it is. You treat people how you want to be treated they spit in your face. Sadly most women go with the men that treat them like crap, and they know it. Which is the greater tragedy?
Unity, I understand your reservations at wanting to accept this as reality. I get it. I used to be like you. But I got more experience, and not just in my own relationships but watching others as well. And I am telling you the God's honest truth and no one will ever be more honest to you than I am being right now. But this isn't just my own experience, this is the world's. Case in point, the book, The Art of Manipulation. Probably one of the best books you'll ever read, because everything in it is completely true. In chapter III entitled "How to Make a Slave out of a Person", it goes into detail on a tactic I've seen men use on women many, many times. In the chapter it describes an experiement where a Pidgeon is trained to peck on a bar to get its favorite food. In the experiment, when the food reinforcement was given to the pidgeon every time it pecked the bar, it pecked it a moderate amount of times. When it was never given reinforcement, it stopped pecking the bar altogether. But when the reward was given intermittently, the pidgeon pecked the bar frantically and incessantly. I quote: "Put simply, if you treat a person well all the time, you are going to be taken for granted. In fact, some people would say you're almost as well off to mistreat a person all the time, thus avoiding the whole relationship. This situation points up an important facet of human behavior: people take for granted what they know they can have....To apply intermittent reinforcement, you follow two clear-cut steps that take advantage of the fact that human beings want what they can't have. First, you set up a pattern of reinforcement by giving your manipulatee something he wants. Second, withdraw it, and watch the person come under your control as he struggles to have the reinforcement restored." -The Art of Manipulation, pp.23,27. The men that are the most "successful" with women often pick this technique up instinctually and use it to their advantage. And it works, almost every time. Odds are, you're using it, or will be the victim of it.
I've been there for a couple of years now. There's no reason to be the stereotypical male after you reach a certain level of maturity. Also, there is no reason to be selfish for material items (televisions, cars, and other over-the-top extravagances) when you can live comfortably and modestly while giving your progeny a good life. There's also the physical selfishness; the "go out and get laid" mentality.
First of all...DUDE! It's Hal! Welcome to GF. I'm sure you remember me. I think that's very true for people who aren't used to being treated well, and I think that could have been the case in my last relationship. I'm not going to say I'm perfect and completely unselfish, because I'm definitely not, but I was loving and honest all of the time and it clearly wasn't enough for her. Maybe she got bored, which is what often happens to nice guys.
Dood! Echoes! I love you, man. I say this with sincerity: Stop being such a nice guy. You will have your heart stomped on. Every. Time. Become a jerk and you will have more success. Basically, become like every other guy.
