Make Me Laugh!

Merc

Certified Shitlord
V.I.P.
#1
This game is simple and theraputic . . .

Simply try and make people laugh! Post a funny picture, tell a good joke, try to make the person before you laugh. Hopefully this will be a good way to calm down and let loose. I'll start off with something that recently made me laugh:

http://oldmanrpg.ytmnd.com/
 
#2
...I set my t-shirt on fire friday night while hot boxing in my car(smoking with the windows up so it stays in there). The shirt has a big hole where my belly button is. I liked the shirt too...damn

my brother was rolling though.

So if you can picture a guy stoned out of his mind trying to figure out how to put his flaming shirt out without dropping the blunt and spilling ashes everywhere and the car is so smokey you cant see your hand in front of you and then on top of it all a really really really gay song came on the radio (dunno what it was but it was TERRIBLE) and it was the worst background music possible for the situation.
 

Iris

rainbow 11!
#3
My flight was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who
seemed to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks.
As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and
told us that "Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he'll be
landing the big scary plane shortly, so lovely people, if you could just
put your trays up, that would be super."

On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed this well-dressed and rather
exotic looking woman hadn't moved a muscle. "Perhaps you didn't hear me
over those big brute engines but I asked you to raise your trazy-poo, so
the main man can pitty-pat us on the ground."

She calmly turned her head and said, "In my country, I am called a
Princess and I take orders from no one."

To which (I swear) the flight attendant replied, without missing a beat,
"Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country I'm called a Queen, so I outrank
you. Tray-up, Bitch."
 
#4
One time when I was high and drunk, I was walking down the street with two of my friends at night. I saw a parked cop car. I bolted over to it, and whipped it out to take a piss on it. Well, I took my piss, and then looked in the window....suddenly, I was starin' a popo in the eyes. My friends were laughing until they heard me shout, "FUCK!". I bolted past them, and it took their high asses a short second to notice why....then they followed me. The cops pursued us in their car....I told my friends to follow me....btw, they were both on the cross-country team...I just have good endurance...anyhow, we started hoppin' fences where the car couldn't follow. They got out on foot and tried to chase us down. Well, I got down into some storm drains that had trees around them....which temporarily blocked the view from the popos...we then hopped back into a yard and bolted thru it...hopped the fence and bolted accross the street. Went around the house and hid in some bushes for a short while...we watched the popos get back in the car about 10ish mins later down the street and we left when it was out of sight.
 
#5
I work in a psych facility so we get patients who hallucinate a lot!

One day at work we noticed a patient who seemed to be hallucinating and we asked.

'Are you hearing or seeing anything not here?"

He looked at us and said,"They tellin' me not to tell you about them."
 
#10
(This is long, but the ending is amusing.)

A fly is hovering over a river. A fish spots it, and thinks: if that fly goes down 3 inches I can hop out and get it. A bear notices the fish and thinks: if that fly goes down 3 inches and that fish hopes out, I can dive on it and eat it. A hunter sees the bear and thinks: If that fly goes down 3 inches so that the fish can get it and that bear dives on the fish, I can shoot the bear for a food. A mouse on the hunters shoulder looks into the hunter's pocket and sees a peice of cheese. The mouse thinks if that fish goes down 3 inces so that the fish can get it and that bears dive on the fish so the hunter can shoot it, the cheese will fall out of the hunter's pocket and I can have a meal. A cat notices the mouse and thinks: if that fly goes down 3 inches so the fish can get and then the bear dives on it so the hunter can shoot it which would cause the cheese to come out of the hunters pocket, that mouse will go after it and I can then chase the mouse to get a snack. Well, the fly gets tired and hovers down 3 inches. The fish hops out of the water and the bear dives on it. The hunter then shoots the bear which causes the cheese to fall out of his pocket. The mouse dives for the cheese, but then the cat is bolting after it and the mouse runs. The cats accidently falls into the river while chasing the mouse. This goes to tell you that when a fly goes 3 inches down a pussy will get wet.