Is it flirting if....

Discussion in 'Dating & Relationships' started by TFHawk, Mar 30, 2009.

  1. TFHawk

    TFHawk Registered Member

    Ok, I'm 22, and I've never asked a girl out. Dont get me wrong, its not like I've never been on a date. I've been on plenty of dates, and I've had two very serious relationships (one of which lasted a year, and the other is still in progress but pushing over three years).

    I've noticed that the reason I dont take that chance of asking a girl out is because I dont want to get shot down. Now when I tell my friends this reason, they give me their signature look that basically says "you're a dumbass", then they proceed to tell me that I had a great chance.

    Obviously I'm really bad at reading signals from women. There's a few things imparticular that I wanted some input about.

    Many times, when I'm out with a girl on date or just hanging out, if I really like girl, I'll play with her hair. Now, I'm going to admit, that flirting aside, its actually very amusing to just play with a girl's hair (sorry, i'm easily amused). But this is one thing that all my friends say is flirting.

    Now, i've never had a girl slap me or give me a weird look, or anything negative when i play with their hair. Actually most of the time, they seem to quite enjoy it. Now, is this actually flirting?? Because it seems to me that a girl just might find it relaxing to have her hair played with.

    Also, I'm known for being a little random, but there's been occassions when I'm hanging out with a girl (this only happens when i'm actually trying to flirt) and we'll get into a deep conversation and somewhere throughout the night Ill try to lighten the mood a little bit by asking the girl to marry me (now, i do this in a very joking but yet sincere manner, so that no one gets offended). Now, I've also been told that this is major flirting, especially when the girl says yet. I haven't been turned down yet, but again, could it not just be that the girl is just trying to be nice, and is just joking aroud too??

    I just think that a little insight into this would be helpful. If I can learn to judge signals better, then it might help me, especially in my current relationship. Thank you

  2. Major

    Major 4 legs good 2 legs bad V.I.P.

    Playing with a girl's hair is definitely flirting, and if she enjoys it then it's probably a good sign that she's into you. Joking around can definitely be pretty flirty, especially asking a girl to marry you, but I think it's harder to get a read from it. But if it seems like she's having a good time then your chances are pretty good, so why not ask her out? What do you have to lose?
  3. Vidic15

    Vidic15 No Custom Title Exists V.I.P. Lifetime

    You have nothing to lose, it's better than wondering "What if" for rest of your life, believe me that playing with the girl's hair is flirting, I do it a lot, I don't intend to flirt with girls that way, but like you said, it's amusing.
  4. Corona

    Corona Registered Member

    It definately could be, and usually is, but the context matters a lot. I would say that whatever you were doing is probably flirting unless explicitly stated and you both know it.
  5. fleinn

    fleinn 101010

    lol. Awesome post. Is the flirting really serious, though? I've met girls I couldn't talk to or flirt with because I felt I wanted it to be serious.
  6. Bliss

    Bliss Sally Twit

    Tell me, do you own a set of balls? Stop being a coward and asking silly questions - just go for it. You obviously know how to flirt and I think deep down you know what you are doing is flirting and you love the reaction you get. If you like a girl then don't beat around the bush - just tell her. Who cares if you get "shot down"? Just move on to the next one. You sound like you have confidence with girls so you shouldn't be scared of asking them out.
    Nobody ever died from being told no.
    Major and Boredie like this.
  7. Nibbles

    Nibbles meep

    Getting shot down by a girl in a rite of passage and not the end of the world. If you do get shot down, act cool and don't beat yourself up about it.
  8. fleinn

    fleinn 101010

    :lol: Even if you really want to.

    "So I found that life is just a game
    But you know there's never been a winner
    Try your hardest - just to be a loser
    The world will still be turning when you're gone
    Yeah when you're gone!"
  9. Choco

    Choco Registered Member

    Yh playin with the hair is flirting 100% + all of us have to be rejected once in a lifetime. its Life experience :p
  10. TFHawk

    TFHawk Registered Member

    lol, very true. I have to say though, I've never regretted my strategy of getting the girl to ask. It's always worked for me, with the exception of one time... and ofcourse, that will always be the "one that got away" and will be a regret each day of my life. So yes, in the end, you're right, because it may work for me every time in my life, except that one time, and it be the girl that i really wanted.

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