If your friend fell in love with you

Discussion in 'Dating & Relationships' started by ysabel, Oct 20, 2008.

  1. ysabel

    ysabel /ˈɪzəˌbɛl/ pink 5

    ...and you had no idea, but the person revealed it suddenly. Also assuming the feeling isn't mutual. How would you handle it? Would you be simply flattered? Would it change anything between you (ex: would you feel more awkward hanging out with your friend)? Is it easier to handle such kind of revelation from someone you're not that close with?

  2. wooly

    wooly I am the woolrus

    this happened to me once. i kind of brushed it aside as best i could at the time and just acted normal from then on. i didn't find it that awkward because i didn't really treat it as a big thing and assumed we were still really good friends regardless, i saw no reason not to be. Unfortunately the girl felt awkward and became sort of quiet and.... unresponsive. Like she was suddenly shy or embarrassed. Eventually we drifted apart due to lack of communication.

    I thought i handled it pretty well at the time but looking back it probably would have been better to tackle the awkwardness head on instead of trying to carry on as if nothing happened.
  3. Merc

    Merc Certified Shitlord V.I.P. Lifetime

    Assuming we're talking about a friend of the sex you prefer to be with (in my case a woman) I'd be a bit flattered but awkward. Even if I didn't have a girlfriend, I don't know if I could date them or even see them the same way again because I know how they feel. I think it's next to impossible to go back after something like that, especially for them.
  4. viLky

    viLky ykLiv

    In my head I'll be like "Why the hell did you have to say THAT for? Dang it, now you dented our friendship... :mad:" I would probably stutter and say "Uhh.... Thanks?" and change the subject to something else. I would be uncomfortable and I would hope it was never brought up again after I've changed the subject. Pretend it never happened? You bet.
  5. ysabel

    ysabel /ˈɪzəˌbɛl/ pink 5

    I will probably be flattered but then I would worry too much if my next actions are sending the wrong signals of feeling the same way.

    "Pretending it didn't happen" may not work for me. We would need to be clear that we're not going anywhere romantic. Until we do that, it'll just be awkward and we'll both end up hurting (him because of his unrequited feelings or expectations, that will probably lead him to move away from me - as a result, I would lose a friend I value).
  6. Oooh_snap

    Oooh_snap Living on the 0th floor V.I.P. Lifetime

    I would probably feel a bit akward. I would still hang out with them as usual. but I would be careful not to say anything to make them feel led on.
  7. Tucker

    Tucker Lion Rampant

    Flattered, not so much awkward; I've been there before and managed to handle it with a modicum of tact.

    Harder, I should think. It would be more unexpected and I might find it a challenge to tailor my words to that woman's personality in order to effect the softest rebuff. There would probably be a greater sense of, 'Oh, I think I'm going to lose this friend.'

    And holy crap, look at your green bars. Have you really been posting for 24 hours straight?
  8. Jeanie

    Jeanie still nobody's bitch V.I.P. Lifetime

    ysabel? she doesn't sleep.

    i had a friend who had feelings for me. problem was he was old enough to be my dad, in fact his son is 5 years older than me. i knew how he felt about me even though he never said anything, and it started to get a bit awkward; plus he's a real danny downer, so i distanced myself from him. he confessed his feelings for me in an email recently, when it had been at least a year since we had had any real communication.
  9. ysabel

    ysabel /ˈɪzəˌbɛl/ pink 5

    That's the scary part, the idea of possibly losing a friend because s/he is in love with you (which is ironic, love is supposed to bring people closer).

    And I've posted 24x (that's once an hour, lol), it's just green because all the others have posted less. I'm surprised because sometimes I see people posting 30s-60s...well not today.
  10. BigBob

    BigBob Registered Member

    It would probably be a little weird at first, but it's something I could probably live with and have it not be awkward.

    My problem would be is I'd probably try and make something out of it..maybe try and have a relationship with them.

Share This Page