I talk to other guys--but I find I am still thinking about him...

Discussion in 'Dating & Relationships' started by bananna, Mar 3, 2009.

  1. bananna

    bananna New Member

    This guy and I were friends for about a year and we always got along, we flirted on and off with eachother, but nothing ever really came about. As time went on, I noticed that he started doing little things that seemed like he liked me--but he never made a move. I KNOW that I could have made a move but it just seemd like we both never got to the point, we would just flirt with each other and wait and it did suck. He started saving little things I would give him, or things that we would get when we were together, he would always be trying to take photos of us together, always willing to help me out with anything, and would talk to other guys, especially when we would be together and he would tell them I was " too much for them", and stuff like that and they should just leave me alone.

    It seems like we were just fine being friends and if sometihng was going to happen in teh future it would, but about a month ago--we actually somewhat, "argued" if you will put it that way. It was not so much an arguement, but more a diffrence of opinions. He stated his opinion on sometihng and i dis-agreed. Now, Note, this opinion he had was on something rather personal to me and I just wanted to set him straight about how I felt. Since while we were "talking", he wouldn't let me get a word in, I e-mailed him how I felt about the whole situation and ever since then, he has not talked to me, gotten back to my message, nothing. I hate to admit..but I guess it could be a pride thing, but I dont know if I should talk to him first. I feel like I put the ball in his court and he just isnt doing anything..so I shouldnt have to talk to him and try to make " ammends" with him. He should try to talk to me, right?

    Could it just be that he isnt really that intrested in me? This whole thing, really isnt that big of a deal and it happened so fast, I didnt think that he would not want to be friends over this. It seems like he just cut me out of his life (Iam assuming this, but I mean, he has not tried to get in contact), I am sure the next time we see each-other will be akward.

    What do I say to him? Do I say anything to him? I dont know what to do. I am sorry this situation may sound stupid..but Iam just looking for some real advice..the truth is, I cant get him off my mind--no matter how much I try to DISTRACT myself. If him not responding to my message, means he doesnt want to talk anymore, I dont know how to forget him. The thing is, I am a sweet/Fun, girl and guys talk to me all the time, but I will be hanging out with them, but thinking of him and I HATE THAT!

    ADVICE/HELP PLEASE.
     

  2. Impact

    Impact Registered Member V.I.P. Lifetime

    If you can't stop thinking about him, then grow a set, and talk to him first. Tell him your confused that you havn't talked in a while, and ask him if you guys are still friends. It may be a case that you have to shelve your pride and apologize to him first if you want to resolve anything.
     
  3. Tucker

    Tucker Lion Rampant

    I don't mean to offend you, but he kind of sounds like a tool. Would you still be interested in him if you knew that he was going to act that way every time you two had a difference of opinion?
     
  4. bananna

    bananna New Member

    Well in all honesty, I might have over did the E-mail alittle..but I do feel that I am sorry for the way the E-mail was written, but I am not sorry that I wrote it. It was the truth and how I felt and he needed to know this. I wont get into lots of detail about this whole mis-understanding, but it was kind of stupid in a sense. It was definitely not worth us getting worked up about..but he got worked up at me first and like i said, I could not even get a word in. He was not yelling at me, but it was one of those moments where he was talking and I see this, but I have no idea what he is saying..b/c I in my head was trying to analyze what he was saying, because it made no sense and everytime I would formulate a sentence, he wouldn't never let me get a word in.

    That was why, when I got home that same night, it was just bothering me..I never got to state what I thought and it was just sort of eating at me, you know. So I just sent an E-mail and I probably would have fared better if I would have waited until I was cooled off abit but I just told him my side of things and thats been it. We have not talked since. It seems to me like he is the type of guy that can "dish it out, but can not take it". I am just really afraid that the next time we see each-other, if we ever see eachother, things are going to be so akward..and not the same. And just note- My e-mail was not Rude, or Dis-respectful--but It was the truth of the matter and I pretty much called him out on where he was wrong. ( because he was). Part of me thinks that..maybe he realized this, that he was wrong, and its a pride thing. I dont know..that just seems stupid to not want to talk things out. I didnt see him as that kind of guy..maybe I was wrong about him. :sigh:
     
  5. Cait

    Cait Oh, poppycock.

    I guess in a way it depends on what the argument was about. Otherwise, if you can't stop thinking about him, you need to contact him. Well, try to. Call him once or twice. Don't do it obsessively, but do it a bit to get his attention.
     
  6. ysabel

    ysabel /ˈɪzəˌbɛl/ pink 5

    One reason you can't stop thinking about him is because of that nasty situation you had. It's not fun to end something (or could have been something) on that angry note. If he's unwilling to talk to you about it it's probably because he's not ready to do so, or he just doesn't care if it's resolved or not. Either way, pushing it wouldn't be my choice of action. I had it happen once to me. I just moved on. It takes a lot of effort but I had to spend my time better doing other things. Several years later (yes, years!!!), I met the guy again and we talked. I asked him about what happened in the past and he admitted he was a jerk and he didn't understand why he acted that way. It's a nice closure for me and am glad to have not spent more time obsessing about it before.
     

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