I just dont know anymore

#1
First off id like to say hi to everyone here.

I currently live in the USA but i was not born here. I have only been here for a few years. I am 26 now. I am married to a US citizen and have 2 step kids who are both under 10 years old. We are not financially making it. I have a green card but cant seem to get a decent job in this terrible economy. The only jobs i have gotten are crap temp agency ones who hire you for a month then lay everyone off cause there's just no work. I used to be happy in life with my friends and my folks back home. It was also a beautiful place. I now live in an ugly city and have no friends or family nearby. I hate it here. I am currently layed off and in the process of looking for a new job but with no solid results. I have tried everything from door to door, to online applications, careerbuilder, monster. you name it Ive done it. And nothing. My wife gets paid $11/hour at her job and works 40 hours/week, sometimes overtime. She has had her job for a while now. She comes at me from time to time when we are fighting about money and other topics like food and cars etc and says things like "when are you going to step up and be a man and take care of your family". That really pisses me off. WTF. I am making a solid effort to try and find work but its just not working out. My parents are also getting old back home and i dont want to waste my life in this country and then 1 day get a phone call saying that one of my parents have died. We cant leave this country for another 5 years due to my wifes previous military contract of 8 years. (shes in the reserves now). But im going nuts here. Everyday i wake up and just cant wait for the day to be over with. I have never been this miserable in my entire life. And i know some people are going to say "you made you bed so you lie in it" and "thats what grown up life is like" but fuck that. You only get to live once and this is not how i want to spend the rest of my life. I have no College education seeing that i did a bit of travelling after i got done with school(hence how i met my wife). My parents live in a poorer country than the USA so i dont accept money from them cause they are struggling as it is. My wifes parents are kinda rich but they dont give a shit about us and give my wifes sister money to buy OUR children Xmas presents in fear that we would spend it on bills and such. WTF. They dont help us at all. They tell me i need to get a job...

I am seriously considering doing nothing from now on and just giving up looking for a job and letting my wife work and support us. Both her and her parents tell me i need to "step up". Well you know what, ive been looking for a job for about 6 months now, finally got one at a temp agency, worked it for a month and then proceded to get laid off with 49 others. Ive been on about 1 hundred job interviews. Im out of ideas and fully frustrated with life in general. I hate this place and want nothing more than to move back home to my family and friends. I would love to take my wife and kids with but ultimately i dont think she will go nor do i think her parents will let us take the kids ( they have custody but thats a whole nother story). I just dont know what to do anymore. i dont want to have a child of my own cause i dont want to burden him/her to this unforgiving place they call Earth.
 

AnitaKnapp

It's not me, it's you.
V.I.P.
#2
You took on the responsibility of a family when you got married. You made the decision to care for your wife and her 2 children. To seriously consider laying back and letting her do all the work is unacceptable. I understand that it's difficult to find a job around here, and that you don't like living here. That's fine and all, but you don't need to give up. Are you sure that the economy is the reason why you're not getting work, and that it's not your attitude? If you've bene on hundreds of interviews, maybe you should take a look at how you're coming off in an interview, and why you're being turned down for a job every time.

That being said...it's 5 years before your wife can leave the country. Unless you want to shirk all responsibility, then just man up and do what you can for your family, until you can all leave together.
 

Jeanie

still nobody's bitch
V.I.P.
#3
you either need to man up and accept the responsibility you took on when you got married, or decide whether you can look yourself in the mirror if you run away. What kind of life were you expecting? Most people don't live like the Hiltons and the Kardashians.