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How often do you feel guilty?

shelgarr

Registered Member
Is it justified? As in, did you do something bad? Or is it that you felt obligated about something? Or is it something subtle that is nagging at you? Like you know you might have done something but are having trouble admitting it?
 

Jeanie

still nobody's bitch
V.I.P.
Almost always, and it's almost never justified. I haven't done anything bad, but I don't feel like I'm reaching my full potential, I've made some decisions that in retrospect were unwise and caused some instability for my daughter, I feel guilty if the house isn't spotless and all the laundry folded and put away, I feel guilty for stupid things I've said in the past (ages ago that other people probably don't remember), the list goes on.

On any given day I can find at least three things to feel guilty about.
 

Unity

Living in Ikoria
Staff member
It's pretty easy for me to feel guilty because I have a big heart...most of the time it's not necessary.

A good example is with my last big school paper. I got a B (84 or so) which is lower than I've gotten on anything in a while but I was perfectly fine with it...I mean I still got an A- in the class, so I was a good student.

What made me feel guilty were the things that I had messed up; the professor was a really cool lady and I felt like I had let her down in making a couple of stupid mistakes.

Other than small things like that, there isn't much in the realm of seriousness that weighs really heavily on my shoulders...maybe one thing but it's from like 10 years ago and I probably shouldn't feel as guilty as I do about it.
 

EllyDicious

made of AMBIGUITY
V.I.P.
I don't really feel guilty when I'm not faulty.
But lately, my boss has been trying to make me feel guilty without any reason.
I don't want these negative feelings to affect me anymore. It's pretty devastating.
 

sunrise

aka ginger warlock
V.I.P.
Pretty much constantly to the point where my boss put two post it notes on my monitor, one saying "sorry" & the other saying "its probably me being dense" to try to remind me to stop saying it as often as I do.

I do try to feel less worried or guilty but I do find it a very difficult thing to avoid.
 

Dabs

Registered Member
Every day of my life. And since that won't be enough damn characters, I might as well add, I don't sleep because I carry guilt. I have a hard time eating sometime, because of guilt. Is it warranted?? Others tell me it isn't and to please stop feeling that way. But I can't help it. I have things I can't forgive myself for, and probably never will, and yes it eats me alive. That's an odd thing about me, I can forgive others quite easily, but never can I forgive myself. I harbor a lot of guilt :(
 

shelgarr

Registered Member
Almost always, and it's almost never justified. I haven't done anything bad, but I don't feel like I'm reaching my full potential, I've made some decisions that in retrospect were unwise and caused some instability for my daughter, I feel guilty if the house isn't spotless and all the laundry folded and put away, I feel guilty for stupid things I've said in the past (ages ago that other people probably don't remember), the list goes on.

On any given day I can find at least three things to feel guilty about.
Do you think that if you had a day that you did reach your "full potential" that the guilt would go away? Or would there be something other that you would find that you had to do. I wonder where this comes from. Is the voice in your head yours, or some one elses?
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It's pretty easy for me to feel guilty because I have a big heart...most of the time it's not necessary.

A good example is with my last big school paper. I got a B (84 or so) which is lower than I've gotten on anything in a while but I was perfectly fine with it...I mean I still got an A- in the class, so I was a good student.

What made me feel guilty were the things that I had messed up; the professor was a really cool lady and I felt like I had let her down in making a couple of stupid mistakes.

Other than small things like that, there isn't much in the realm of seriousness that weighs really heavily on my shoulders...maybe one thing but it's from like 10 years ago and I probably shouldn't feel as guilty as I do about it.
I think you might be confusing guilt with perfectionism. Good grade btw! As for those things from long ago, do you think there is a tool that people can use to relieve themselves of guilt? Seriously....guilt has no purpose this far down the road.
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I don't really feel guilty when I'm not faulty.
But lately, my boss has been trying to make me feel guilty without any reason.
I don't want these negative feelings to affect me anymore. It's pretty devastating.
Thats scummy when people try to manipulate with guilt. So extremely passive. Stay strong!
------
Pretty much constantly to the point where my boss put two post it notes on my monitor, one saying "sorry" & the other saying "its probably me being dense" to try to remind me to stop saying it as often as I do.

I do try to feel less worried or guilty but I do find it a very difficult thing to avoid.
LOL....creative boss. Sounds like your lucky to have someone that is able to make you see it head on. Maybe with time, you'll figure out why the worry and guilt is there.
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Every day of my life. And since that won't be enough damn characters, I might as well add, I don't sleep because I carry guilt. I have a hard time eating sometime, because of guilt. Is it warranted?? Others tell me it isn't and to please stop feeling that way. But I can't help it. I have things I can't forgive myself for, and probably never will, and yes it eats me alive. That's an odd thing about me, I can forgive others quite easily, but never can I forgive myself. I harbor a lot of guilt :(
Oh Dabs! I'm sorry it tortures you. I suppose it's guilt that helps to insure we don't repeat mistakes. But besides that guilt is not useful. Right? Just putting it out there.
 
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Jeanie

still nobody's bitch
V.I.P.
Do you think that if you had a day that you did reach your "full potential" that the guilt would go away? Or would there be something other that you would find that you had to do. I wonder where this comes from. Is the voice in your head yours, or some one elses?
it's my own conscience, coupled with pathological perfectionism. I have impossibly high standards for myself, so I highly doubt that I could ever live up to what I deem as my "full potential". It also has to do with my Catholic upbringing (in a charismatic Christian cult, no less) and family dynamics.
 

shelgarr

Registered Member
it's my own conscience, coupled with pathological perfectionism. I have impossibly high standards for myself, so I highly doubt that I could ever live up to what I deem as my "full potential". It also has to do with my Catholic upbringing (in a charismatic Christian cult, no less) and family dynamics.
ooooo. quadruple whammy. But looking at the evidence of success around you and that it excels over all the unreasonable guilt, can't it be possible to outsmart it?
 

LxDroid

Registered Member
yeah i feel guilty all the time. most of the time because i did something. but also if i couldnt help someone with their problems. i have a big heart, and i want to help everyone.
 
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