How much should parents "control" their children?

Merc

Certified Shitlord
V.I.P.
#1
This is a spin-off of the piercing thread.

Do you think it's right for parents to make decisions regarding their young children (from piercings all the way to religion)? Is there any place to draw the line? How can children be responsible for themselves when they would not survive on their own without their parents? Shouldn't this mean the parents are responsible for that childs' rights and what happens to them?
 
#2
I've always wanted my girls to be individuals, able to think for themselves. I've been told that I've actually been too lenient in that regard because I allow them too much freedom in their thinking. For instance, I don't believe in God, but my youngest has come to the conclusion that he's out there somewhere. I'm perfectly fine with that and would never try to dissuade her to come to my way of thinking.
I guess I'm more of a learn by experience and trial and error type of parent.
Now, that being said, if it comes to somethign that could potentially hurt them, drugs, alcohol, etc...then I will state my opinion and expect them to follow along.
As far as doing anything to their bodies, I wonder how I'd respond to this thread had I had a boy? I've always thought circumcision was a rather cruel way to start life, much more so than a hole in the ear.
 

Merc

Certified Shitlord
V.I.P.
#3
I'm not talking about older children Angels, I'm talking younger, like single digits here. The piercing thread had a lot of people getting really heavy with the whole "choice" thing, claiming it's wrong that the kid doesn't make the decision. I'm just wondering where those people and others think a line should be drawn? Surely a parent must control and make decisions for a toddler or infant, we can't honestly be concerned about what they want since they can't express nor defend it. The parents are basically two people, themselves and their kids until those kids can at least speak for themselves.
 

EllyDicious

made of AMBIGUITY
V.I.P.
#4
that's not an easy topic to talk about.

i've been living with my parents so far, and still am. i'm not sure where's the line that parents should not cross when it comes to controlling their daughters/sons.

but if you're talking about little kids, then that's different. parents have a huge impact on children's life for almost anything (usually) but it also depends on how the child was raised and how much they're connected to their parents.

so when it comes to "the right to controll your kids" it depends on what you're talking about, it depends on what the matter is.
if we take religion, i think parents play a big role. since religion is somewhat related to morals and education so parents are children's example until a certain age. even if parents might not control their children when it comes to religion, they themselves will take their parent's belief as the right one.

I don't agree with parents telling children what their belief should be though. My mom has always been telling me i am a muslim and that's the way i should be because she is muslim and so are our ancestors. I think she's wrong but i hadn't have the chance to talk about this because we don't usually talk about religious stuff in our family.[so i'm sure we're not real muslims, at the end of the day].

when it comes to piercing, [which is something i'm not fond of when the piercing is done in tongue, nipples, genitals or whatever], i don't know what i would do with my kids. i mean ..i'm sure no matter what i did, i couldn't stop them if they wanted to do it so hard.

parents should advice their children about everything and sometimes they should force them to not do anything they think it's wrong for their child. children will always think they're right even when they're wrong.
i think this is a case by case issue. i wouldn't agree that children are allowed to do anything they want with their life, with their body when this might be hurtful to them.
some mistakes will remain as a big hole in your life. if you're 14 and you get pregnant, this is something that will affect your child's life maybe forever.

your experience matter, but sometimes other's experiences matter more and that's when the child should stop and think.

parents should learn their children to things things through, especially when it comes to advices.
(in many senses) being a parent is the most difficult thing in the world.