How do i stop cutting myself?

#1
i am 13 and my life has gone to shit. my best friend is dead and i cant stop cutting my legs. my friends want me to stop but it's hard. whenever i try i end up doing it again, i need help! what can i do?
 

Wade8813

Registered Member
#2
It's hard. People who start cutting tend to keep doing it for many reasons - it distracts them temporarily, and it releases endorphines.

That said, it's also dangerous, and even if nothing goes wrong, it can cause long term damage.

The only advice I can think of is to talk to a counselor (at school or otherwise) about help, and ask your parents to help you. Both of those can be hard, but if it saves your life, it's worth it.
 

dDave

Guardian of the Light
V.I.P.
#3
There is a part of your brain that develops fully as you gain experience in life (it's fully developed by about 25).

This is sort of the part of your brain that knows the difference between right and wrong, good and bad, etc. It also gets used to certain feelings that it feels consistently as you grow up.

As you grow-up this part of your brain gets used to having certain feelings that maybe relieve stress or some kind of addiction. Cutting can be defined as good (or necessary) by this part of the brain or tell your body that you need it.

I don't know how to help you stop but it's important that you do.

I'd try and get a counselor, maybe talk to your parents (especially if they don't know). Maybe even just talking periodically with a good friend about it will help. But if all else fails get a counselor.

I know several people that used to cut, they are different people today after stopping I can tell you that. They are so much more fun, loving, and in general more enjoyable to be around.
 

SmilinSilhouette

Registered Member
#4
I just lost my best friend on the April 4th so I understand how hard that can be. I'm sorry for your loss.

You need to talk to a responsible adult that you trust. Tell them what you have been doing and have them get you help. Your county should have a community mental health department. They can get you the help you need. Please get help! If you can't bring yourself to talk about it then write a note to that responsible adult who loves and cares about you. You have already taken the first step here by asking for help. Please keep taking these steps so you can get the help and advice you need.
 

Unity

#WOKEN
Staff member
#5
I have to echo what everyone else is saying...don't hesitate telling people. Cutting is common these days and it's nothing to be ashamed of, but it's definitely something to address. A school counselor or a trusted older family member would be great choices.
 

Tucker

Lion Rampant
#6
Hey, questioneer. The death of a friend, especially at a young age, is devastating. There's no way to make it alright. It's no surprise to me that it's put you in a dive. Don't feel bad about that, either. You're a normal human and we break down and/or turn to less-than-healthy ways of coping when pushed beyond our limits.

Someone I care a lot about is a cutter who hasn't done it since last fall. Stopping anything that we feel driven to do is very difficult and you need to give yourself a lot of slack. Stressing over the fact that you're caught up in it will only make things worse. Allow yourself as many tries as it takes. Be good to yourself, you've been through a lot. Doctors often help, too. Insist on being seen, it's your right.

While you're on the road to quitting but not home free yet, be careful not to give yourself an infection or slit an artery. Although cutting is not usually a suicidal act, complications and accidental deaths do occur. You're not a surgeon, after all! Take a moment or two to calm yourself well beforehand and never use an instrument that isn't 100% sterile. Taking these precautions can help prevent more difficulty in your life on top of what you already have to deal with.

Best of luck, dude. Stop in and update your thread when you can.
 

idisrsly

I'm serious
V.I.P.
#7
Well done on coming out and talking about it, even though it is just with online strangers. That is a good start right there already. You may not think of it like this as the moment, but admitting it to others and asking for help to stop is most definitely the first step of a healing process.

I've been there and done that, so I honestly understand why you are doing this. "I bleed just to know I'm alive!" For the longest time I did not even care who knew if I did it or not. I would laugh and grin if someone asked me to stop. It might be diffirent for you, but I know for myself I did it for the attention I got as a result!

I urge you to please listen to the advise the members before me has given you. It is extremely hard reaching out to an adult (even for me as an adult). but you must do this. I suggest the counselor route, as it is often easier to open up to a third party that does not know you that well, but can help. You need to take stock of your life to find out why you are doing this. What are all the reasons you feel your life has gone to shit and then deal with those issues directly.

Try to find another 'healthier' outlet. Cutters tend to be very dedicated to their cutting - find something else to be dedicated to, but make sure it is a healthy outlet. I cannot stress this enough.

I will be looking for your posts to update us. And remember, no one at GF will ever judge you, so be honest with us. We are here to listen and offer advise where we can!

Good luck!
 

storm_ina_C_cup

Registered Member
#8
i am 13 and my life has gone to shit. my best friend is dead and i cant stop cutting my legs. my friends want me to stop but it's hard. whenever i try i end up doing it again, i need help! what can i do?
I'm sorry for your loss.

Stopping is easier said than done. Alot of people who cut themselves usually do it when their emotions / behavior get the best of them, it's an unhealthy and dangerous coping mechanism, whether it's for attention or a scream for help, etc. Either way, I would strongly suggest you bring this to your parent's attention, let them know that you're hurting yourself and that you want to stop but you find it very hard to do it on your own. More than likely (if you cannot stop on your own with your family's help) you will need professional guidance and support to help you through this. They will get to the bottom of things, find out why you're cutting yourself and help you with your recovery by giving you (and your family) strategies to cope and handle a situation when you feel the urge to cut, etc.

Good luck to you.
 

EllyDicious

made of AMBIGUITY
V.I.P.
#9
i am 13 and my life has gone to shit. my best friend is dead and i cant stop cutting my legs. my friends want me to stop but it's hard. whenever i try i end up doing it again, i need help! what can i do?
Your friends should take you to a doctor and a psychologist if they want you to stop for real. :(
I'm sorry to hear about what you're going through, but if your friends can't convince you to stop, how can we [from a forum] convince you to stop ?
Where are your parents? Are they aware of all this?\

Don't limit yourself in seeking for help within friends/family.
You need professional help to get out of this completely and consciously.

Keep us up to date please.
Good luck!
 

Bliss

Sally Twit
#10
Why did you start doing it? I know you lost your friend and I'm sorry for that but what was the reason you did that to yourself? You're doing it somewhere that nobody can see it so it's not as though you are looking for attention. I just can't begin to understand why people do this to themselves.
I think you should speak to someone about how you're feeling. Because you're young it must be hard to grieve. I've never been there so I can't begin to understand.