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How can I get my daughter to ditch her boyfriend

Keri35

Registered Member
My daughter is dating a real jerk. I'm trying to get her to see this. I don't want to push her away by telling her all the time what a jerk he is. Any tips on how to do this without upsetting her? She is 21.
 

NellyBell

Registered Member
Yeah, probably not the best idea to keep telling her he's a jerk if she's anything like me in my younger days. I don't really know how you could go about it without upsetting her. What does she say when you call him a jerk? How long have they been together?
 

Godsmirror

Registered Member
Whenever she wants something, or advice or just to talk in any way, behave in the exact opposite way as her boyfriend does. The love of a parent is one thing, but it's more powerful when it counteracts a negative in real time. Nobody is so thick that they won't pick up on what you're doing.

You'll be telling her, without telling her, that she can do better because she DOES do better when she interacts with you.
 

Impaired

Registered Member
You can't. The best you can do is expose his jerkiness to her again and again. However, she may feel differently.

You really have zero control over other adults.
 

Keri35

Registered Member
Thank you for all the ideas. I really don't want to push her away, and right to him. I try to be there when she is having a tough time with him. I'm always nice but I do insert my opinion too much.
 

Konshentz

Konshentz
Kill him.



Kidding.



Give it time, she'll figure it out and bail.
 

Mirage

Secret Agent
Staff member
V.I.P.
Give him $1,000 to never see her again. If he takes it, she’ll see he’s a jerk. If he refuses, he’s got class and maybe you were wrong about him. If he takes it and then still chills with her then I guess the joke is on you, but you were right at least... haha

(Not seriously recommending this method.)
 

Hilander

Free Spirit
Staff member
V.I.P.
If her friends see what a jerk he is maybe they will say something to her. Would be more effective than hearing it from you.

Another thought is if you could get a video of him being a jerk to her and let her watch it might help her see him differently. Wouldn't do this in a way it looks like spying though.

If you are real lucky she will meet someone else and dump him.
 

Smelnick

Creeping On You
V.I.P.
It sucks to watch your kids making mistakes, but they have to in order to learn. Just be there. Stay in her life. Either he'll smarten up or she will. Just wait, if he really is bad for her, she'll see eventually.
 

Pepper

Registered Member
It depends on how old she is I would say. If she's a teenager, she will definitely do the exact opposite of what you tell her. But if she's an adult, maybe you could get someone else to talk some sense into her. Maybe a "cool" ant or something? Just an idea.

Good luck!
 
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