Girls making the first move

Discussion in 'Dating & Relationships' started by ysabel, Sep 24, 2010.

  1. ysabel

    ysabel /ˈɪzəˌbɛl/ pink 5

    It seems that it is more acceptable for guys to make the first move than the girls. No one would say they're being too easy, or too agressive. Compared to several years ago, I hear more in my entourage how girls don't wait anymore for guys to call them or get their number or ask them on a date.

    Maybe you're one of those who think it doesn't matter who makes the move, or maybe not. I wanna hear your opinions/reasons, for example in these cases:

    - making first contact (strike a conversation, introduction)
    - getting a phone number
    - asking someone out on a date
    - saying i love you
    - marriage proposal

    Feel free to add scenarios.

    Do you prefer the traditional view that guys should be the one doing these? If you're a guy, how do you feel if a girl does those things first? If you're a girl, have/would you made/make the first move?

  2. Bubbles

    Bubbles I ♥ Haters

    For me, personally, I never ask a guy out. I feel like I'm coming off a bit too easy or something. The first contact is definitely something I leave to the guy, all the other things you mention, probably somewhere down the line, I'd initiate them.
  3. Dabs

    Dabs Registered Member

    I will and have asked a gentleman out.
    I have called a gentleman and asked him to go out for brunch....I'm not afraid of things like that~
    With it being 2010, I think dating has opened up more, and women feel like they can have more control or "say-so" in their relationships.
    However, I will add, I am not a bar hopper, I don't go about that way looking at gents...I take more of the casual ways of approaching.
    I think some men might like it that a lady is not too shy to be the first one to ask :)
  4. LifeinthePond

    LifeinthePond Mark ov teh Pond

    I don't know, really. I'm not much of a risk taker. Around here women outnumber us 3 to 1. The market for men is very, very lean. Especially if you're talking in the traditional sense. Like the man earning more bread and "wearing the pants." I personally feel if a girl really wants someone, they'd make the first move. Bag him before someone else does. Not saying that everyone's motivation is security and wealth, or anything. It sure helps.

    Just how I feel.

    It's weird too, because I don't think I know a single person dating someone the same class as them (personally). It's always 2+ years older, or younger, extending into great number. Even I have been asked out by several 16-year-olds... I promptly rejected them and did nothing.
  5. generalblue

    generalblue Where is my Queen?

    I prefer girls to make the first contact. To me it is much more convinient than a me making first contact because there are no ackward moments, like, is she trying to blow me off, playing hard to get, usually women I talk to first give mixed signals and sometimes that makes me turn away.

    If the conversation is good and I like really like the girl and she is not "easy." I will typically ask for the phone number, but sometimes I will get thrown off and the girl will ask first.

    Then I will ask her out on a date, and I don't believe in the 3 day rule so typically I will ask her the next day or so. I don't like saying I love you, I will show her how much I love her, but I will respond if she said that she loved me "ditto" like in Ghost.

    And yes I would propose, that's how it is suppose to be done right.
  6. MAgnum9987

    MAgnum9987 Do What Thou Wilt

    I've always been shy around women, and not very confidant talking to them, so I'd love it if girls would balls up (ha I love irony) and ask guys out more instead.
  7. Shooting_Palanx

    Shooting_Palanx The Rock is cooking atm..

    I'm a pretty confident person, you just gotta go in sometimes! If I talk to let's say a girl for sometime, and I sense there's something there, than I'm probably gonna make the first move most likely, it's better than waiting till the last minute, sometimes it doesn't turn out the way you want it, but hey, life is about taking chances :)
  8. Wade8813

    Wade8813 Registered Member

    IMO, there is a double standard as far as what's acceptable for men/women to do, and it has a large influence on this.

    IMO none of the 5 things you listed should make a woman seem "too easy". You've got a few screws loose if you think someone who just introduces themselves to you is "too easy" because of it. And when you're talking about saying "I love you" or proposing marriage, hopefully the guy will know her well enough not to come to some snap judgment.

    And it seems to me that they'd be about as likely to make a man seem too aggressive as a woman.

    I have no problem with it. To be honest, I'm not really looking for a relationship right now. If someone asked me and I was kinda interested, then I'd probably say yes, but I'm not going to be asking anyone out any time soon - so if it's gonna happen it's up to her (for now at least).
  9. syed2011

    syed2011 Registered Member

    I prefer that girls should give signal first otherwise its waste of time., if she is really interested in you then you should talk her once and ignore her, try to talk other girls in-front of her. , dress well always
  10. EllyDicious

    EllyDicious made of AMBIGUITY V.I.P. Lifetime

    I'm old fashioned so I've never done the things you listed. I hope I'll never do them.
    I'm being quite unfair to think that when girls wmake the first move, then they're in your hands. I wonder why we always judge women who make the first move and not men. Men could be called easy too but why is it more acceptable for a man to be easy than for a woman...?

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