Gays going straight

Discussion in 'Politics & Law' started by EllyDicious, Mar 24, 2010.

  1. EllyDicious

    EllyDicious made of AMBIGUITY V.I.P. Lifetime

    This post led me to open a new thread regarding the gender orientation issue.

    -If gays had the chance to become straight temporarily/permanently ...would they take this chance?
    [I'm sure gays themselves could give a good answer to this].

    -Do you personally know any gay/lesbian who went straight? Did this happen because they were "forced" to or because they realized they weren't really gay?

    TO MAKE THIS CLEAR : Let's suppose homosexuality is a choice![which I think it isn't] [but for the sake of this debate.. let us treat it as a choice.]
    Last edited: Mar 24, 2010

  2. storm_ina_C_cup

    storm_ina_C_cup Registered Member

    If you had a "chance" to become a lesbian or bi, would you?

    I don't know any gay or lesbian that would change their sexual preference if they had a "chance" (unless they are attracted to both sexes). But it's not really about "chance", it's about what they are sexually attracted to.

    I, myself, find men and women physically attractive, have experimented with a couple females in my early twenties but I would never become a lesbian or bi because I very much prefer di*k over minge and I am very much sexually attracted to the male speicies for many reasons.

    And to answer your qestion, No, I do not know any gay / lesbian who has gone straight or ever wanted to go straight. They're all perfectly content with their same-sex relationships / encounters.
  3. Diederick

    Diederick Registered Member

    Once more: sexuality itself is not a choice. The only choices are to recognize it, tell people about it, accept it and make it part of your life.

    Besides that, being gay, I wouldn't want any choice to begin with. Natural diversity is not to be messed with, as long as it is not negative. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for stem-cell research and DNA decoding and stuff like that; but I'm also an individualist and care about the beauty of diversity.

    If I had the choice, I would choose to be homosexual. I think it has been a vital part of my life in making me who I am. I would never have been as deep in religion and philosophy and forums as I am now, would I have been straight. Much of my strength and personality is the result of struggles and discoveries all coming from the fact that I am gay.

    Besides, I'm more of a man-person anyway. Women are great, but I often come across communication difficulties which all men (including straight men) seem to have. Men are so much more cuddly...

    To the other point: I know of no man who is gay that has gone straight. Perhaps for one night, but certainly not actually. But I do see how it could seem like someone who is mostly gay to go mostly straight. The sexuality spectrum.
    Sorry it has a white background...

    You see, probably no one is 100% straight or gay. We just define ourselves as that extreme we are closest to. I'm probably 90% gay, so I define myself as gay. I can find women attractive, and I certainly know women whom I would be able to build a healthy romantic relationship with - but it's just not like with men, and sex with women really disgusts me (just the thought of it! :urp:). But if someone is more or less bisexual, I can imagine them bouncing off to the complete opposite of what is expected of them (young people often 'bounce off' like that to feel individual and independent from their parents/adults); only to later find out they are perfectly fine with someone of the opposite gender as well.

    Sexuality is not something that changes or can be changed. It is determined before birth and people simply find out what they're in for when adolescence kicks in. People can choose to pretend to be something they're not, but no one can sustain such self-deception. Even ex-gay ministries don't claim to actually change a person's sexuality, just their sexual conduct. They're still gay, they just don't act like it, and such repression is probably what the APA finds so harmful.
  4. EllyDicious

    EllyDicious made of AMBIGUITY V.I.P. Lifetime

    You want me to answer?
    No, I wouldn't because of the way gays/lesbians are seen/treated. Given that this is still an issue, it means that they're always seen as "abnormal"[as persons].
    Why would I take a chance that leads people to see me as abnormal?
    I'm sure my friend/family [even the society I live in] would never want to see me anymore. They think gays are animal people, who have a decease and they should be excluded from society. They find it disgusting.
    Why would I want all this for myself? I don't think I'd call myself lucky if I were a lesbian living where I live.

    To make it more clear, personally [as I've said in another thread] I've changed my ideas on gays/lesbians. I don't think they're abnormal as persons and in no way do I think like my family/friends/society ..
    I just think their relationship is just strange but this has got nothing to do with their personality/character or them as human being.

    Said this, If homosexuality was seen as normal, [ just like heterosexuality], ... then YEs. I'd take the chance to try and be gay [lesbian].
    I haven't read your whole post yet.

    I know it's not a choice. I edited my OP to say that let us suppose it is a choice.
    Last edited: Mar 24, 2010
  5. Diederick

    Diederick Registered Member

    That's sweet, thank you. :) I know most people here will know it's not a choice, but some would need a reminder.
  6. EllyDicious

    EllyDicious made of AMBIGUITY V.I.P. Lifetime

    Totally understandable. I guess that makes you proud of you who are today.

    Well yeah ...sleeping with the same gender ... especially when it's a one-night stand, doesn't make us gays/lesbians.


    A stupid question out of curiosity. Is it true that every homosexual has some heterosexual experiences before they realize they're gay/lesbian.?
    Which means you tried sex with women until you realized it was disgusting or you know it without having the need to try it?
  7. Merc

    Merc Certified Shitlord V.I.P. Lifetime

    First off, I think it's a mistake to even attempt to map human sexuality.

    Secondly, I don't think many gays/lesbians at all would change unless they were really young. Once you have a lifestyle you're used to it's not very easy to just switch to something else.
  8. EllyDicious

    EllyDicious made of AMBIGUITY V.I.P. Lifetime

    What do you mean?
    Were you referring to the sexuality spectrum Diederick posted?
  9. Stegosaurus

    Stegosaurus Registered Member

    I understand the hypothetical situation, and I fully agree with the belief that sexual orientation is not a choice.

    I have had a gay friend or two tell me about the struggles they have endured, but none of them have ever spoken about sincerely wanting to be straight. The reason for this is largely like what Diederick said--it made them who they are.

    That being said...hypothetically, let's say it were three years ago, I had not met my fiancee yet, and suppose for the sake of the argument homosexuality was actually a "choice."--I think in some conceivable universe I could see myself "choosing" to be homosexual because I think that I could be useful in the fight for equal rights and acceptance. I like fighting for unfairly disenfranchised groups (Not that I would have to be gay to be effective, as it should not matter).

    When I see a gay couple holding hands, my heart warms at the thought of there being love there and not hate. I think this hypothetical "desire" to be straight or gay depends upon the context. If I were living in San Fransisco's gay community, I think I would want to be gay--I would probably feel more accepted.
  10. Merc

    Merc Certified Shitlord V.I.P. Lifetime

    That and more. What if someone asked you to map human emotions? Do you think you could do it and do it well? Any sane person will tell you no. The same goes for human sexuality. I don't see how it can be graphed on a spectrum or chart of any sort.

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