Friends or more?

Discussion in 'Dating & Relationships' started by EllyDicious, Oct 7, 2009.

  1. EllyDicious

    EllyDicious made of AMBIGUITY V.I.P. Lifetime

    Let's suppose you have a close friend of the opposite sex and you've been friends for a very very long time now [for years].., you hang out together, you tell each others' problems, you care a lot about one another ...BUT nothing more has happened between you...

    - Do you have friends like that? (of the op. sex).
    - Do you believe there's a true and plain friendship between a girl and a boy / a man and a woman? Do you think this friendship will always remain friendship?
    - Have you ever thought about making him/her more than just a friend?
    - Do you believe that after a very long time friendship, it's impossible to become more than just friends with that person?
    - Have you ever felt jealous of the partners he/she has had/has?

  2. Rebeccaaa

    Rebeccaaa yellow 4!

    -I don't have anyone that I'm really really close with, but yes, I've had a lot of friends that were guys over the years. Most of them I knew for about 3 years before we kind of lost touch, and I still know a few now that I've been friends with for quite a lot longer than that. We don't tell eachother our problems or anything like that anymore though. Most of them are my [female] friends' boyfriends lol.

    -Yes I do. I know for sure that my friends will never be anything more, partly because most of them are dating girls who are also my friends. :lol: Ok I'll just focus on one from now on. He's a lovely person but I'm in no way attracted to him beyond the friendship level.. never have been in all the 4 years I've known him.

    -Nope, never. Even when I knew him before he had a girlfriend.

    -I dunno. I think every case is different... for me it would be, but for other people then well I guess it's possible. Sometimes two people are right for eachother but the timing is always off or one of them is always dating someone else.

    -Nope, never.
  3. Babe_Ruth

    Babe_Ruth Sultan of Swat Staff Member V.I.P.

    I use to have a lot of friends like that when I was younger, a few times I wish I made out with them or even go out with them but in the end it would be awkward because we were so close.

    It's not the same thing today, most of my close friends are guys. I don't really have close "girl friends" and I don't think of making out with them or even going out with them.
  4. EllyDicious

    EllyDicious made of AMBIGUITY V.I.P. Lifetime

    Why would it be awkward when you just said you were so close?

    is it me or you make it sound a a boy friend of mine who says "i'd rather have a girlfriend than a lot of friends who are girls .. "
    why is that?
  5. Babe_Ruth

    Babe_Ruth Sultan of Swat Staff Member V.I.P.

    Because I am so close to them as friends, it would be so much different if we actually started dating. It's really hard to explain into words, but it's just the way I fill.

    I'm not sure what you mean by your last question because it's a fairly confusing question. But I don't mind having a lot of "girl friends" even if I had a girlfriend.
  6. EllyDicious

    EllyDicious made of AMBIGUITY V.I.P. Lifetime

    no. that's not what i actually meant.
    i meant that some guys feel like it's a waste of time to have friends (girls) because they are fed up and they want something more from girls ...
    so a girlfriend would be better in that case.
    since they can't date their friends who are girls, they don't have any girl friends at all...but chose to have a girlfriend once in a while.

    once i had a guy asking me to date him..and i wanted him as a friend. and he said : "seriously, if you feel like dating me, fine. if not, let's not see each other anymore because i don't need any girl friends. i have a lot of friends (girls) and i don't need another one. i'm more interested in datings now...
    if you can't do that with me, bye bye..." [and of course i said bye]

    did you get me?
    so i though this is the reason why you don't hang out with girl friends.
  7. Babe_Ruth

    Babe_Ruth Sultan of Swat Staff Member V.I.P.

    I do have "girl friends" and no it doesn't bother me that they don't want to have sexual relations with me. I wouldn't even attempt anything with them.

    Those guys that you speak of are big a-holes in my opinion. All they have in mind is sex, don't get me wrong I think about it all the time. But I don't have the same mentality about it like they do.
  8. EllyDicious

    EllyDicious made of AMBIGUITY V.I.P. Lifetime

    unfortunately seems like most of the guys have that stupid mentality "all or nothing"...
    it's plain for interest.
  9. English-Emo-Boy

    English-Emo-Boy Supreme System Lord V.I.P. Lifetime

    When I was at college I had loads of female friends who I'd known for many years.

    Most of them I'd never thought twice about dating or anything as I considered them just friends, feelings never grew beyond that. There was only ever one girl who I'd grown close to but never ever happened as I never declared me feelings.

    There are some people who I'd find it extremely difficult to have a relationship with purely because we'd been friends for so long.

    No, I've never been jealous of friends' partners.
  10. Jaszibabes

    Jaszibabes The Instigator V.I.P. Lifetime

    I've had a few friends like that.

    No, I don't. I mean, I'm sure it happens, but the ones I've had didn't last.

    Thought about it, did it, didn't work.

    No, it's not impossible at all. I think it's easy to develop feelings for someone you are so close to. But sometimes you are just meant to be friends.


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