Female insecurities

Discussion in 'Politics & Law' started by merob, Sep 30, 2006.

  1. merob

    merob Boom!

    In my experience I've noticed a lot of girls are extremely insecure. It's amazing how easy it is to bump into teens who're practically prostituting themselves under the impression it's okay. As sympothetic as it sounds, insecurity and low self esteem are often the cause.
    Life puts a lot of pressure on our female community. I feel a bit uncomfortable myself some of the time. Aside form being denied certain basic equal rights, it's often required women are fasionable and presentable in order to fit in. Actractiveness is a big deal in the girl world - which sucks cause a lot of girls aren't attractive.

    Something happend to me today [I'll discuss later in the thread hopefully] - it made me want to bring all this to your attention. I dont know how good of a discussion it'll make. thanks for readin

  2. WindAndConfusion

    WindAndConfusion Registered Member

    I think the word you want is "patronizing."

    (Irony not intended, but humorous nonetheless.)
    You're a dick.

    I don't mean that in a bad way, though. What you said is completely true, and I think most of the harm comes from people trying to pussy-foot around the issue.

    There's a George Orwell essay, only slightly related but interesting on its own, that this thread made me think of. I'll post it if I can find it.
  3. SenatorB

    SenatorB J.S.P.S

    I'd venture that there are equally many guys who are extremely insecure, but it simply is not noticed as much for several reasons. First, when a guy acts like these girls who are "practically prostituting themselves", it's not seen the same way, but is seen almost as normal and as just being a Pimp. Also, guys may express their insecurities in different ways... taking it out through sports is one common way... so it might not be as noticable.

    No he's not, he's just telling the truth, in no way putting any judgement on it but merely expressing the situation. And he's right, there are a lot of ugly girls... there's a lot of very attractive girls too, and there's lots of ugly and attractive guys for that matter... the point isn't that there are lots of ugly girls in the world, so much as that ugly girls are treated worse than attractive ones and that isn't very fair.
  4. Merc

    Merc Certified Shitlord V.I.P. Lifetime

    Okay, first off, people, please resort from the whole "there are lots of insecure men, too, sexist!" That's not what this is about. We're not talking equality here.

    It's not always that they believe it's okay, it's that they're trying to get the kind of attention they read about, see on TV, and hear in music. Women are still objectified in the media quite a bit, as I'm sure most are aware of. Granted, it has been getting a bit better, but it's still there.

    They aren't attractive by your standards, or the media's? I love this whole beauty ideal that we give to women. So many of them are convinced (from a young age) that they have to have big breasts, small hips, and a nice ass. Just watch a woman who is self-conscious (Shouldn't be hard to find one) stare into a mirror. Some can't look, some start analyzing every part of their bodies, and thankfully, some aren't affected as much as the other two. Of course it's good to care about your image, but when you're trying to mold yourself into somebody else, then it's dangerous.

    It pisses me off too how much women are obsessed with their looks and how some don't have the courage to avoid sinking in to this $2 hooker look that seems to be all the rage. We could sit here for days, blaming all sorts of media outlets, like magazines, movies, rap music, whatever. The fact of the matter is that women aren't told enough that they are great the way they are. It's such a turn-off to me to run into a girl that is so self-conscious that she can't help but stare into every mirror she passes.

    Ladies, care about your image, it's a good thing. However, please don't think that you have to live up to the beauty standard set down by our culture. Not all men are shallow, not all of us will ignore you if you're not paper thin, and not all of us will damn you for not putting out on the first date.

  5. Kazmarov

    Kazmarov For a Free Scotland

    There's also a whole problem with sexual standards-teenage girls who have sex are deemed to be whorish or loose, and those that don't are ostracized from their own groups for being too timid. The "One Night Stands" and "Is Porn Degrading?" threads have a lot of stuff relating to this.

    Girls have a lot of social pressure that are unique to their gender. Body shape usually is much more narrowly accepted, usually thin is in and everything else causes girls to be outcasts. Thus the reason that girls have a 9:1 ratio of eating disorders to males. There's also of course things that still are around, such as the glass ceiling. Women's wages vs. men have also largely stagnated


    creating insecurities about whether they are wanted or their job performance.

    The problem is what people perceive attractiveness to be, thin, done up with cosmetics, and with large breasts/posterior. Beauty is far more objective than that. There are girls at my school I consider attractive that share no common traits with say, Circle_One. It's a fickle business, and often people have been brainwashed by the media and their friends to develop an unhealthy and untrue idea of body image.

  6. Icyblackflame

    Icyblackflame Registered Member

    All the time at my school, you see girls being made fun of - by other girls - because they don't look a certian way. In fact, I remember just a few days ago that a girl (she's one of my friends, but I won't drop her name) told this one girl "Well, if you do your hair all nice, buy the right clothes (she took this time to rant on about how ugly the girl's shoes looked), talk the right talk, etc, then you can hang out with us, 'cause you're a cool person to be around." (paraphrased a bit...don't remember it word for word) Keep in mind that she's in the "popular" crowd. My point, it's not always pressure from the magazines and television directly (although I'm sure it's where all these "ideals" came from), but from friends and school members. In our school (like most other schools,) it's based on "groups." If you're not a part of the "popular" group (The rich group. Really, they're the only people I know who can afford to buy $150 shoes and like 3 new (expensive) outfits EVERY week), then the guys really don't want to date or verbally accept you. Period. Why? Rumors. Gossip. Fights. Unneeded rep, etc. I know guys who will talk about how they like a girl to one person, and then say how they don't to the "more important" crowd. I really don't think it has much to do with "absolute perfect attractiveness," but simply who has accepted you.

  7. scitsofreaky

    scitsofreaky Registered Member

    I find it hilarious that that teens are being treated as women in this topic. Teenagers are insecure, that is part of being a teen. They are making a huge transition from being a dependant child to being an independant adult. Also, they are becoming more socially active, with the addition of sexuality, something that a new experience.
    As for actual women, there are plenty of totally secure women.
  8. Kos4Evr

    Kos4Evr Registered Member

    I look at it this way, a girl's looks aren't as important as personatily as well as intelligence and similar interests, but if there is something very wrong with a person's appearance such as looking like something out of a horror movie then I have to say no. I have 1 rule about the girls I will date, she can't weigh more than me unless there is a very good reason. I'm not opposed to dating girls that are a little bigger than average but I will not date a woman who is almost twice the size she should be. I like healthy and athletic, myself and being close to 6 foot tall helps. But if there is more to love and it looks good I won't complain.

    Female insecurities are biased towards those who resemble Barbie. And that is wrong. Bigger isn't always better, but some times it is. Beauty is not found in appearance, but in interpretation.
  9. Kazmarov

    Kazmarov For a Free Scotland

    Body Image

    I'm looking at stats and given that well over 90 percent of women cannot acheive something close to the media ideal of body perfection, I think that would breed insecurity in at least a decent sized portion of women.

    Also, 60 percent of anorexia cases are in women 20 and up. That's a good sign of insecurity. Bulminia also has a significant amount of cases up to the age of 35.

  10. breathilizer

    breathilizer Resident Ass-Kisser

    I don't buy this whole self-esteem cop out, for males or females. Everyone feels bad sometimes, even beautiful people. Everyone feels good sometimes, even ugly people.

    How do you think stupid people feel when they get bad grades? Stupid right? Good. That's what's supposed to happen. Likewise, if an ugly person can't get laid because of their looks and that makes them feel bad.... GOOD. Sadness is a natural motivator. Stupid? Try something that doesn't require brains so much. Ugly? Try something that doesn't require people to look at you. Stupid and ugly? Try desperation. Find someone as stupid and ugly as yourself.

    It's natural eugenics.

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