Ever been to drunk.....

icegoat63

Son of Liberty
V.I.P.
#1
...to seal the deal?

All the serious discussion lately has taken away from some of the light hearted goofy threads. Here's one hoping to resurrect some of that fun.

ok lets hear the embarrassing limp d*ck stories about how you were intending to nail some skeeze but you were FAAAAAAR too hammered.


disclaimer:

if this thread offends you in any way. stay out, simple as that. any prude comments about our immorality and eventual hellion demise are not welcome. This thread is directed at members of the legal consenting age, however its inevitable younger members will venture in, so lets keep it PG-13 and follow the rules.
 

agphoenix

Everything goes.
#3
Honestly, if I'm waaaaaay too hammered, I'm just thinking about going around making jokes and trying to make people laugh. I never really think about picking anyone up.

Although all through one series of parties, I ended up 'making out' with the same girl, but was painfully aware that 'AG Jr.' was taking his time to suck some blood!
 

icegoat63

Son of Liberty
V.I.P.
#4
I don't think it's fair of you to start a thread like this without sharing your own story.:D

lmao touche!

Well I would have but didnt wanna dwarf the OP with my own humiliations ;)

So there was this one time I think of... hahaha unfortunately there have been some of those "one times" that stick out in my memory. It was at a small party with mostly friends. This girl and I had been hitting it off real well, she was sorta known to get around and I hadnt gotten a ride on that particular bicycle just yet. Well this night was one where Redbulls and Jagermeister were flowing heavily. I cant even remember how badly I punished my liver, funny how Jager has that ability to clean a persons memory ;)

She and I flirted pretty much all night and then when it was go time she led me to one of the stables in the back of the barn..... one thing led to another, you know the fun stuff. I remember frantically trying to take my belt off and was having trouble mostly because I was wearing boot cut wranglers that were getting stuck on my big ass. I did the hop on one foot thing and tripped on the feed bucket, fell down, blacked out, and woke up the next morning buried in straw hay.

Fortunately I think she was a good sport about it because I never got made fun of for it. Good times though.
 
#5
:lol: That story was hilarious goat! If I could rep you again right now, I would.



I remember frantically trying to take my belt off and was having trouble mostly because I was wearing boot cut wranglers that were getting stuck on my big ass. I did the hop on one foot thing and tripped on the feed bucket, fell down, blacked out, and woke up the next morning buried in straw hay.
Maybe I've got it all wrong here, but doesn't "boot cut" refer to the bottom of the leg of the jeans? If so, would you mind explaining how that has anything to do with the size of your ass?:lol:
 

icegoat63

Son of Liberty
V.I.P.
#6
Well boot cut Wranglers tend to fit tighter along the waist and thighs... Hence coining the term:



Because I've played hockey all my life I've got a big ass...Theres no way Superman could have been a cowboy because he'd need more room than a phone booth!
 

wolfheart

Registered Member
#7
It has been my misfortune to be beyond the realm of a romantic encounter.
A very nice young lady,who i was very interested in asked me to walk her home after the pub closed,being a kind and gentle young man i agreed.
There was,from what my hazy memory can recall,a lot of kissing and the promise of a lot more.
I made the mistake of lying down while she went to slip into something more comfortable,the one time my insomnia did'nt kick in.
The amount of alcohol i had consummed ruined what would have been a fun night,oh and she never asked me back again!.