I just keep wondering why was this guy eating Vaseline :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: >>> >>> >>> If this story doesn't make you cry for laughing so hard, let me know and >>> I'll pray for you. >>> >>> This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years. >>> The only friction in their marriage was the husband's habit of passing >>> gas loudly every morning when he awoke. The noise would wake his wife and > >>> the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air. >>> >>> Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because >>> it was making her sick. He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was >>> perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that >>> one day he would blow his guts out. >>> >>> The years went by and he continued to rip them out! Then one >>> Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he >>> was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the bowl where she had put the >>> turkey innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts and a >>> malicious thought came to her. >>> >>> She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep >>> and, gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic >>> waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his >>> shorts. >>> >>> Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting >>> which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic >>> footsteps as he ran into the bathroom. >>> >>> The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor >>> laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned she had >>> got him back pretty good. >>> >>> About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his >>> bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his face. She bit her >>> lip as she asked him what was the matter. He said,"Honey, you were right. > >>> All these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you." >>> >>> "What do you mean?" asked his wife. >>> >>> "Well, you always told me that one day I would end up blowing my guts >>> out, and today it finally happened. But by the grace of God, some >>> Vaseline, and these two fingers, I think I got most of them back in." >>> >>> LOL LOL LOL LOL!!!!