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Co-worker relationships (romantic)

thealigator

Registered Member
I have never had a romantic relationship with co-workers. To be honest aside from a very select few I don't have relationships with people I work with that often outside of the office at all if I can avoid it. This is not me being unsocial but more wanting to keep my private life private from people I really don't know that well.

I have however known people who have formed romantic relationships with co-workers. A friend of mine in a previous employment met his partner and they have been seeing each other for a number of years and now live together. I have also known people who have dated in work places.

I don't see anything wrong with this, I would not wish to do it as I worry that if any fall out were to happen it could make life difficult to say the least but what is your view? Do you believe they are a good idea? Does it work out that often and should there be rules in place that state "staff may not fraternise with other staff" as I have heard in some work places it is frowned upon.
 

Hilander

Free Spirit
Staff member
V.I.P.
I know people have office romances all the time but if they don't work out sometimes the drama can be crazy. All you need is a stalker after you all the time, trying to create a posse of friends, that really don't know shit, to give you hell to make going to work a nightmare.

Of course sometimes they do work out and if they do it can be great.

All I can say about this is approach with caution.
 

NewGamePlus

Registered Member
I have never had a romantic relationship with co-workers. To be honest aside from a very select few I don't have relationships with people I work with that often outside of the office at all if I can avoid it. This is not me being unsocial but more wanting to keep my private life private from people I really don't know that well.

I have however known people who have formed romantic relationships with co-workers. A friend of mine in a previous employment met his partner and they have been seeing each other for a number of years and now live together. I have also known people who have dated in work places.

I don't see anything wrong with this, I would not wish to do it as I worry that if any fall out were to happen it could make life difficult to say the least but what is your view? Do you believe they are a good idea? Does it work out that often and should there be rules in place that state "staff may not fraternise with other staff" as I have heard in some work places it is frowned upon.
NOTE: The only intended part of all that is... (manually retyping now...): "Do you believe they are a good idea? Does it work out that often and should there be rules in place that state "staff may not fraternise with other staff" as I have heard in some work places it is frowned upon."

Short answer, there should be nothing prohibiting real love or any chance for real love nomatter what the circumstances.

However, the world we live in today is not capable of handling this concept and is getting increasingly incompetent at it, threatening real love for us all (even in these circumstances)

The horrifying truth is that not enough people care to change this. Most people are satisfied with the bars and clubs and "meeting mills" that the working world would rather have us all go to to meet people, so no one ever fights to change things, and that is frightening for some of us who care about real love.

So if you're wondering, depending on the EXACT type of work, workplace, and the people running it, it's often WAY more than "frowned upon" and outright not allowed.

I firmly believe that exceptions should be made to work around whatever work people happen to develop romantic interest on, and the amount and degree of exception should be based on how deep or potential for being deep the connection between the people is. But, you'd be hard pressed to find enough people, especially those in charge OF the particular job, to be willing to support this.

It starts with people needing to care about real love above all else in the first place.

That's one of the reasons why I take the stance I do against political correctness in as many contexts as there are to do so. Because that's the first step to breaking the high-level barriers like this one.

It's getting worse. And not enough people are helping.
 

Bubbles

I ♥ Haters
I'm against them. But I think that's mainly because I dated someone I worked with when I was 18 and neither of us were really mature about the inevitable break up. Thankfully, while HR didn't get involved, it was still pretty awkward being around the guy. Lucky for me, I left a couple of weeks after the break up to pursue college, but still... that was some major fucking awkwardness and drama that I really didn't need.

Also, I've seen people hook up with co-workers and then do some pretty terrible shit to one another after shit goes south. Everything from cracking sex jokes about their partners to one woman even claiming sexual harassment. Yeah, do not want. I have enough on my plate without that bs in the mix. That's not to say that I don't develop crushes on co-workers every now and then, I just don't act on them.

That being said, if it works for you, more power to you.
 

Konshentz

Konshentz
I guess it depends on how much you like your job. They are almost always a terrible idea in my opinion. I had to learn that the hard way and now I do my best to avoid them like the plague. But hey, if you think you've found "the one", why let some silly little job get in the way?
 

Impact

Well-Known Member
V.I.P.
I've seen them work out (recently went to the wedding of some former colleagues) and I've seen them crash and burn. For me personally, when it comes to romantic relationships they have crashed and burned. Sex only with colleagues is another matter entirely..
 

Unity

Living in Ikoria
Staff member
I work in a small office of 14 people or so, and none are women that I'd have any interest in romantically or sexually. If it was a different story, I don't know. I don't think office flings or casual sex would ever be something I'd do. If it was a natural falling in love with a female coworker situation I probably wouldn't fight it, but I'd be very selective.
 

NewGamePlus

Registered Member
Jobs aren't held accountable for respecting the private lives of their employees. They think everybody is disposable and that all relationships are meaningless, and so does the law. Until jobs and employers and everybody in charge start dropping like flies and getting sued for screwing with personal lives, they'll keep doing it.

I'm sure I said something like this already, but it bears repeating. If you really want an employee-employee or employee-client relationship badly, and your job doesn't accept it without really serious conditions, be prepared to build up the damage for years and then turn around and sue your company for the damage caused. That's the only way they're ever going to learn and things are going to change, is if people start doing that... apparently.
 
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