Am I being too needy/pathetic?

Discussion in 'Dating & Relationships' started by Hypnoticmeg, Jun 7, 2010.

  1. Hypnoticmeg

    Hypnoticmeg Registered Member

    So I'm in a relationship of 6 months and I stayed home from work sick today. My boyfriend said he was going to his friends house after work to write up a best man speech for a wedding this weekend...and asked if I wanted him to stop by with soup or anything on his way there but I declined (I didn't want to bother him)....So we usually talk most nights at some point but he never came online and never called/texted. I figured he was still with his friends and didn't want to bother him so i just waited....and waited. So finally at 11pm i text him "um goodnight?" and he says he's sleeping and sorry...

    Am i being too needy or pathetic by thinking he should have called or texted at some point to see how i was doing knowing that i was sick, and also to say goodnight? I didn't get mad at him or anything but inside thats how i feel and it sucks...:sigh:

  2. Unity

    Unity #AllTogetherNowSTL Staff Member

    I wouldn't say you are being too needy; probably a natural instinct to expect a text when you're feeling bad, but if he was doing a best man's speech with a buddy it could have been a really busy and fun time for him. I would try not to worry though, and reconsider the anger part. Sounds like a consistent guy, and you can't always have the same routine, especially after only 6 months.

    Hope that helped a little! And welcome to GF!
  3. Hypnoticmeg

    Hypnoticmeg Registered Member

    Thanks, I've been looking for a forum to join so I hope this one is a fun place....

    I guess it makes me just wish I hadn't tried so hard to bring him things and go out of my way when he was sick...if i don't even get a phone call when i am :shake: But I will just let it go I suppose.....
  4. Unity

    Unity #AllTogetherNowSTL Staff Member

    Don't forget that he had gone to work on a speech, after work. He was probably pooped, I would think. Judge the situation not by this day when you're feeling bad and he's busy, see where things go in the next few days. If he doesn't take care of you then, you can start getting mad. :)
  5. EllyDicious

    EllyDicious made of AMBIGUITY V.I.P. Lifetime

    Well, what you were waiting for was normal.
    I mean, saying "hi" or saying "goodnight" or exchanging a few words through text message, wouldn't hurt anyone.
    It's like he easily ignored you as if he was writing a speech for the President.
    You're not being needy. You didn't cross any line. You respected his space.

    He needs to give you some explanation ... ;)
  6. PretzelCorps

    PretzelCorps Registered Member

    It's nothing to be enraged about, but it's perfectly okay that your feelings are hurt. Everyone gets a little needy and lonely when they're sick, and busy or not, he probably should have at least asked how you were.
  7. Corkman

    Corkman Registered Member

    If it happens for a week or two then be concerned, but one night? It's really no big deal.
  8. Bliss

    Bliss Sally Twit

    It depends really. Do you text each other good night every night? As previously said he was probably tired from doing the speech and just went straight to bed. Also, maybe he didn't want to disturb you seeing as he knew you were unwell. At least he offered to make you some soup. I wouldn't even address it to be honest. It might come across as a bit much.
  9. storm_ina_C_cup

    storm_ina_C_cup Registered Member

    Needy? Yes. Pathetic? Not really but you could head down that line if you're not careful.

    "um goodnight"
    ...You could have just said, "good-night, I'm off to bed now". And left it at that.
    Why the "um"?

    Just because your boyfriend didn't "check in" (and that's exactly what it is) doesn't mean he's forgotten about you, doesn't care about or loves you any less; more than likely he got home late and went to bed. No big deal.
    ...The next time it happens don't sit by the computer or phone waiting for him to get intouch; do your own thing and if you don't happen to talk / text each other until the next day, so be it, you're relationship isn't going to fall apart just because you missed a night or two.;)
  10. EllyDicious

    EllyDicious made of AMBIGUITY V.I.P. Lifetime may not seem a big deal but it could fall apart if this goes on several times.
    it could show lack of interest from his part.

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